I love my Job, I love the Pay! I love it more and more each day. I love my Boss, he's the best! I love his boss and all the rest. I love my Office and its location - I hate to have to go on vacation. I love my furniture, drab and gray, and the paper that piles up every day! I love my chair in my padded cell! There's nothing else I love so well. I love to work among my peers - I love their leers and jeers and sneers. I love my computer and all its software, I hug it often though it doesn't care... I love each program and every file, I try to understand once in a while!! I'm happy to be here, I am I am, I'm happy to give lots of taxes to my Uncle Sam. I love this Work

Q: Why did the Iraqi chicken cross the road? A: To take over the other side.

Found in micellaneous things. If at first you don't succeed, skydiving isn't for you. I don't have a short attention span, it's just that I- Etc.:a sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do. My mind not only wanders; sometimes it leaves completely. If your dog is fat, you're not getting enough exercise. Without geography, you're nowhere. When someone tells you nothing is impossible, tell him to dribble a football. Man who scratch ass should not bite fingernail. Baseball is wrong; man with four balls cannot walk. Man who drives like hell, bound to get there. It takes many nails to build a crib, but one screw to fill it. Crowded elevator smells different

What is the new name for a taxi in Oshakati? A computer. Why? It has windows, always crashes, & is driven by a thin black floppy with a virus.

Jesus sees a woman being assaulted by an angry crowd and steps in front of her and says, "let he who hath no sin cast the first stone." From the crowd comes a rock flying at the woman. Jesus looks over and says, "Damn it mother, sometimes you really piss me off."

You know you live in California when... 1. You make over $250,000 and you still can't afford to buy a house. 2. The high school quarterback calls a time-out to answer his cell phone. 3. The fastest part of your commute is going down your driveway. 4. You know how to eat an artichoke. 5. You drive to your neighborhood block party. 6. Someone asks you how far away something is; you tell them how long it will take to get there rather than how many miles away it is. You know you live in New York when... 1. You say "the city" and expect everyone to know you mean Manhattan. 2. You have never been to the Statue of Liberty. 3. You can get into a 4-hour argument about how to get

Once,there was a teacher and a girl named Wendy.The teacher asked for Wendy to say a sentence starting with the word I. So wendy started to say I is....Then the teacher said, "No Wendy, it is I am." So Wendy said, "I am the ninth letter if the alphabet."

I bet it was really tough being an Apostle of Jesus. What if you wanted a day off? You ring up Jesus and say, "Jesus, I'm sick today, running a little fever and feeling congested so I won't be able to make it to today's sermon. What...? Say that again...? I'm cured?"

A boy was assigned a paper on childbirth and asked his parents, "How was I born?" "Well honey..." said the slightly prudish parent, "the stork brought you to us." "Oh," said the boy. "Well, how did you and daddy get born?" he asked. "Oh, the stork brought us too." "Well how were grandpa and grandma born?" he persisted. "Well darling, the stork brought them too!" said the parent, by now starting to squirm a little in the Lazy Boy recliner. Several days later, the boy handed in his paper to the teacher who read with confusion the opening sentence: "This report has been very difficult to write due to the fact that there hasn't been a natural childbirth in my family for three generat

Godzilla, King Kong, and a smart blonde are all on the Empire State Building. Who jumps first? None. Because none of them exist!

An English teacher wrote this phrase on the board and asked her students to properly punctuate it: "Woman without her man is nothing." MEN WROTE: Woman, without her man, is nothing. WOMEN WROTE: Woman! Without her, man is nothing.

Joseph, a rather religous man with a rather large sweet-tooth, had voleentered at the church bake sale. Business was booming, at least around noon, but by two o'clock, it was practically barren. While no one was looking he took a donut from the table. On his way home he started to feel guilty. "It was just one donut," he told himself "just one dollar, thats all." "But it was a dollar that the church should have." Another side told him. It continued this was for the rest of drive. When he got home his wife was setting dinner on the table. It was a beatiful Sunday ham. After dinner she took out a heavenly fresh cherry pie. He refused to eat it. He couldnt even look at another pastry and si