Dating process : 6 weeks : I love U, I love U, I love U. 6 months : Of course I love U. 6 years : GOD, if I didn't love U, then why the hell did I propose? Back from Work: 6 weeks : Honey, I'm home. 6 months : BACK!! 6 years : What did your mom cook for us today?? Gifts: 6 weeks : Honey, I really hope you liked the ring. 6 months : I bought you a painting; it would fit the motif in the living room. 6 years : Here's the money. Buy yourself something. Phone Ringing: 6 weeks : Baby, somebody wants you on the phone. 6 months : Here, for you. 6 years : PHONE RINGING. Cooking: 6 weeks : I never knew food could taste so good! 6 months : What are we having for dinner tonight? 6 years : AGAIN!!!!

1.dumb guy: I have'nt slept all nite on the train. Friend: Why? Dumb guy: Got upper berth. Friend: Why did'nt you exchange? Dumb guy: oye, there was nobody to exchange with in the lower berth. 2. A Teacher lecturing on population - In India, every 10 sec a woman gives birth to a kid. A dumb guy stands up - We must find & stop her! 3. Dumb guy - Why are all these people running? Man - This is a race, the winner will get the cup. Dumb guy - If only the winner will get the cup, why are the others running? 4. Teacher: "I killed a person." Convert this sentence into future tense. Dumn guy: The future tense is, "You will go to jail." 5. Dumb guy gets ready, wears tie, coat, goes out, cli

How to identify a dumb guy. You should be sure the person is a dum guy when he: • Puts lipstick on the forehead because he wants to make up his mind. • Gets stabbed in a shoot-out. • Sends a fax with a postage stamp on it. • Tries to drown a fish in water. • Thinks socialism means partying. • Trips over a cordless phone. • Takes a ruler to bed to see how long he slept. • At the bottom of the application where it says "Sign Here" he puts "Sagittarius." • Studies for a blood test and fails. • Sells the car for gas money. • Misses the 44 bus, and takes the 22 twice instead. • Drives to the airport and sees a sign that said, "Airport left", he turns around and goes home.

It takes about 20 seconds for a red blood cell to circle the whole body. It's been proven that people can lessen reactions to allergies by laughing. Laughing lowers levels of stress hormones and strengthens the immune system. Six-year-olds laugh an average of 300 times a day.Adults only laugh 15 to 100 times a day. In the middle ages, people would pin the name of their sweetheart to their sleeve on Valentine's Day and keep it there for a week, hence 'wearing their heart on their sleeve'. It was during the Victorian era that the formerly nude Cupid was redesigned as wearing a skirt. The human heart creates enough pressure while pumping to squirt blood 30 feet!! February 1865 is the onl

# During World War II, twice as many fighter pilots were killed during training than combat # In 1962 an outbreak of contagious laughter in Tanganyika lasted for six months and caused schools to be closed # A nautical mile measures 6,080 feet while a land or statute mile is 5,280 feet # No one can drown in the Dead Sea. It is 25 percent salt, which makes the water very heavy # Plants watered with warm water grow larger and more quickly than plants watered with cold water # Earth's oceans contain 7 1/2 million tons of gold, dissolved in the water # Children who are breastfed tend to have an I.Q. seven points higher than children who are not. # The bird flu virus could evolve into a for

# Astronauts can't belch- there is no gravity to separate liquid from gas in their stomachs. # Ancient Roman, Chinese and German societies often used urine as mouthwash. # The average person who stops smoking requires one hour less sleep a night. # The Mona Lisa has no eyebrows. In the Renaissance era, it was fashion to shave them off! # Because of the speed at which Earth moves around the Sun, it is impossible for a solar eclipse to last more than 7 minutes and 58 seconds. # The night of January 20 is "Saint Agnes's Eve," which is regarded as a time when a young woman dreams of her future husband. # There are over 25 million bubbles waiting to burst out of each bottle of Champagne #

# Zero is the only number that cannot be represented by Roman numerals # Kites were used in the American Civil War to deliver letters and newspapers. # The song, "Auld Lang Syne" is sung at the stroke of midnight in almost every English-speaking country in the world to bring in the new year. # For every real Christmas tree harvested, two to three seedlings are planted in its place. # Drinking water after eating reduces the acid in your mouth by 61 percent # Peanut oil is used for cooking in submarines because it doesn't smoke unless it's heated above 450°F # The Shell Oil Company originally began as a novelty shop in London that sold seashells # The roar that we hear when we place a

#1 Do you know the names of the three wise monkeys? They are: Mizaru(See no evil), Mikazaru(Hear no evil), and Mazaru(Speak no evil). 2 # Warner Comm. paid $28 million for the copyright to the song 'Happy Birthday.' #3 Intelligent people have more zinc and copper in their hair. #4 A comet's tail always points away from the sun. #5 The "Swine flu" vaccine in 1976 caused more death and illness than the disease it was intended to prevent. #6 Caffeine increases the power of aspirin and other painkillers, that is why it is found in some medicines. #7 The military salute is a motion that evolved from medieval times, when knights in armor raised their visors to reveal their identity. #8 If yo

#1 In ancient times strangers shook hands to show that they were unarmed. #2 Strawberries are the only fruits whose seeds grow on the outside. #3 Avocados have the highest calories of any fruit at 167 calories per hundred grams. #4 It cost the soft drink industry $100 million a year for thefts committed involving vending machines. #5 The moon moves about two inches away from the Earth each year. #6 The Earth gets 100 tons heavier every day due to falling space dust. #7 Due to earth's gravity it is impossible for mountains to be higher than 15,000 meters. #8 Men's shirts have the buttons on the right, but women's shirts have the buttons on the left. #9 Mickey Mouse is known as "Topoli

# In 1875 the director of the US patent office resigned. He said that there was nothing left to invent # The Channel between England and France grows about 300 millimeters each year # The average person's field of vision encompasses a 200-degree wide angle # Offered a new pen to write with, 97% of all people will write their own name # On average, a person has two million sweat glands # Grapes explode when you put them in the microwave. # Wearing headphones for just an hour will increase the bacteria in your ear by 700 times. # Your tongue is germ free only if it is pink. If it is white there is a thin film of bacteria on it. # The attachment of the human skin to muscles is what caus

#1 Every time you sneeze some of your brain cells die. #2 Historically, a blue ribbon has been awarded for first prize. #3 The motto of M-G-M movie studios is Art for Art's Sake. #4 The lion that roars in the MGM logo is named "Volney." #5 It cost 7 million dollars to build the Titanic and 200 million to make a film about it. #6 The Titanic was the first ship to use the SOS signal. #7 The Mercedes-Benz motto is 'Das Beste oder Nichts' meaning 'the best or nothing'. #8 The color blue has a calming effect. It causes the brain to release calming hormones. #9 There are more Rolls Royce cars in Hong Kong than anywhere else in the world. #10 X-ray technology has shown there are 3 differen

# Your left lung is smaller in size than your right lung, it is like that in order to make room for your heart. # Until babies are six months old, they can breathe and swallow at the same time # Male human brains are about 10 percent heavier than female brains # Before 1800 there were no separately designed shoes for right and left feet # The glossy look to lipstick comes from fish scales, which are iridescent # To find out if a watermelon is ripe, knock it, and if it sounds hollow then it is ripe # Honey is used as a center for golf balls and in antifreeze mixtures # The original name for the butterfly was 'flutterby' # Your body weight is lower at 9 A.M. than at any other time of t