Is one Nobel Prize so much to ask from a child after all I've done?

There once was an X from place B, That satisfied predicate P, He or she did thing A, In an adjective way, Resulting in circumstance C.

The Armenian Radio was asked: "Is it good to have sex with an open window?" The Armenian Radio answers: "Yes, but with a woman it is better."

A Scottish highlander is asked what his three wishes would be. He first wishes for a lake full of whisky. His second wish is for a similar quantity of good food. When asked for his third wish, after a moment of indecision, he asks for a second lake full of whisky.[2]

The confused protagonist suddenly finding himself in the presence of the genie, who informs him that he has one wish left; he has just used the second wish to completely undo the effect of the first, including his own memory of making it. Undaunted, the protagonist makes his third wish, only to have the genie comment wryly (just before disappearing) that he wished for the same thing the first time.

What do you do when you see a Mexican riding a bike? Throw a stone at him, it's your bike!

Lady on telephone: "Hello sir, I want to meet & talk to you. You are the father of one of my kids." Guy (stunned!): Are you Sandra? No. Jenny? No. Amy? No. Betty? No. Lady (in confusion): "No sir, I'm your son's class teacher."

What is represented by this? R E N N U R Runner up!

Can you complete this sentence using two words which are anagrams of each other? Whilst driving his car at a reckless speed, the driver was distracted by his dog _______. Luckily, he managed to complete the _______ manoeuvre without crashing. Whilst driving his car at a reckless speed, the driver was distracted by his dog barking. Luckily, he managed to complete the braking manoeuvre without crashing.

Can you decipher this phrase? B BUSINESS BUSINESS A C K Getting back down to business!

What was the last thing that Abraham Lincoln did? He died.

This is a true story. I was texting my one friend, and we both get bored easy. This is part of our one convo. Him: Mew! I'm a kitty! Me: Woof! I'm a puppy! Him: Oink! I'm a cow! Me: Quack! I'm a zebra! Him: Bang! I'm a hoe! Me: Man, u got me beat on tht 1!