How many blondes does it take to screw in a lighbulb? None, they just assume they've gone blind.

Q: What do you call 50 black guys in a hole? A: Afro-Turf

Why shouldn't you take a Pokemon in the shower with you? Answer: Because it'll Pikachu! (peek at you...)

Once upon a time, there was a small family, with a little boy named Harry. They had just moved into a new home. It was tall, creaky, and just the place you would expect to be haunted. But, Harry did not believe in ghosts, or mummies, or witches or any of that stuff. One day, his parents had to go to the store. They said,"Harry, if you need anything, just call us, or your neighbors." He replied,"I'll be fine." So they left, and Harry was alone. He went to his room, and started to read a book. But, he was interrupted by a little *raprap*. He went downstairs to see if someone was knocking on the door. There was no one there. He heard it again! *raprap* He went back to his room. He heard it a

A professor stood before his class of twenty senior organic biology students, about to hand out the final exam. "I want to say that it's been a pleasure teaching you this semester. I know you've all worked extremely hard and many of you are off to medical school after summer. So that no one gets their GPA messed up because they might have been celebrating a bit too much this week, anyone who would like to opt out of the final exam today will receive a 'B' for the course." There was much rejoicing in the class as students got up, walked to the front of the class, and took the professor up on his offer. As the last taker left the room, the professor looked out over the handful of remaining st

A drunk phones the police. He yells, "Come quick! Thieves have stolen my dashboard, steering wheel, brake and gas pedal, and my dang radio!! MY RADIO!!" The police are just about to send out an officer when the drunk phones back. He says very calmly, "Sorry officers. It turns out I just got in my backseat."

*குடிக்காரன் களை…பார்த்தா ஜனங்க ஏன் ஒதுங்கி போறாங்க தெரியுமாடா*…..*தெரியாதே…..நீதான்சொல்லேன்*நம்மளபார்த்தா…..அவ்வளவு பயம் டா*..,*ஆமாமா…ரோடுலே போற…சொறி நாய்ங்க…குணம்எப்படி…இருக்குமுன்னுசொல்லமுடியாது…டபுக்குன்னு மேல..வுழுந்து புடுங்கி வைச்சிடுமே*….

How many little brothers does it take to change a light bulb? Three- one to hold onto the bulb and two to turn the ladder.

Never play leapfrog with a unicorn.

Questions and answers selected from tests in Springdale, Arkansas in 2000 to 16 year old students! (Don't laugh too hard - one of these may be the president some day.) Name the four seasons. Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar. Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to drink. Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists. How is dew formed? The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire. What is a planet? A body of earth surrounded by sky. What causes the tides in the oceans? The tides are a fight between the Earth and the Moon. All water tends to flow towards the moon, because there is no

Every "Hormone Hostage" knows that there are days in the month when all a man has to do is open his mouth and he takes his life in his hands. This is a handy guide that should be as common as a driver's license in the wallet of every husband, boyfriend or significant other. DANGEROUS: What's for dinner? SAFER: Can I help you with dinner? SAFEST: Where would you like to go for dinner? DANGEROUS: Are you wearing THAT? SAFER: Gee, you look good in brown. SAFEST: Wow! Look at you! DANGEROUS: What are you so worked up about? SAFER: Could we be overreacting? SAFEST: Here's fifty dollars. DANGEROUS: Should you be eating that? SAFER: You know, there are a lot of apples left. SAFEST: Can I get y

You are so stupid, you took a ruler with you to bed to see how long you slept!