The preschoolers' Sunday school teacher told them that she wanted each of them to learn one fact about Jesus by the following Sunday. The next Sunday, she asked each of them what they had learned. "I learned that he was born in a manger," said Julie. Timmy said, "I learned that he threw the money changers out of the temple." "What about you, Johnny? What did you learn?" the teacher asked. "He has a pick-up truck and he doesn't know how to drive," replied Little Johnny. Curious, the teacher asked, "And where did you learn that, Johnny?" "I learned it from Daddy," Little Johnny explained. "When we were driving down the highway, a pick-up truck cut right in front of us and Daddy shouted,

Is the reason they make oriental flavored noodles for Americans to get back at them for eating our dogs?

What's the difference between a bird and a fly? Well, a bird can fly . . .

I Found this on another website, it is soooo true =D You call your dog Shinji and your cat Neko. You perform a canon ball dive into a pool while yelling "Spirit Bomb!" Your house has an anime room. You and your friends flash peace signs and take girlish poses when you are happy. You get an anime tattoo. Even though you're scared of needles. Your walls are covered in wall scrolls and posters from your favorite series. If you use the term 'Kawaii' for describing everything. You try to convince your girlfriend that 'cat ears' and 'tail' really looks good on them. You can sing songs from your favorite shows, in Japanese, even though you don't speak Japanese... You spent hours l

"I've just had the most awful time," said a boy to his friends. "First I got angina pectoris, then arteriosclerosis. Just as I was recovering, I got psoriasis. They gave me hypodermics, and to top it all, tonsillitis was followed by appendectomy." "Wow! How did you pull through?" sympathized his friends. "I don't know," the boy replied. "Toughest spelling test I ever had."

John Kallam graduated with a BA in criminology and entered the U.S. Army. He served for 20 years beginning in the late 1930's. He was an investigator during the Nuremberg trials of Nazi war criminals, and stayed in Germany for many years organizing civilian police forces in the post-war era. He also wrote numerous books on criminal justice. He retired from military service in the late 1950's at the rank of full colonel. Returning to Fresno, California, he began teaching criminology at what was then Fresno State College (later to become the California State University, Fresno.) His work was well respected, but after about ten years of service, he was called to see the president of the colleg

If Henry IV were cloned, would he be Henry V, or Henry IV Jr. or, would he be Henry IV Part II? (Willy Wagstaff, more usually known as William Shakespeare)

Intelligent people have more zinc and copper in their hair. Copper is a brown-red color, correct? This is scientific evidence to back up blonde jokes!

On the sixth day God turned to the Gabriel and said: "Today, I am going to create a land called Canada. It will be a land of outstanding natural beauty. It shall have tall, majestic mountains full of mountain goats and eagles. It will have beautiful sparkling lakes bountiful with bass and trout, forests full of elk and moose, high cliffs overlooking sandy beaches with an abundance of sea life, and rivers stocked with salmon." God continued, "I shall make the land rich in oil so as to make the inhabitants prosper, I shall call these inhabitants Canadians, and they shall be known as the most friendly people on the earth." "But Lord," asked Gabriel, "don't you think you are being too generous

Once a bird pooped on me, so I threw it back.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Kentucky Fried was on the side he was leaving from.

A child was born one day with a condition that limited him to only being able to whisper - unable to speak loudly or normally. At about 30 years old he finally goes to the doctor wanting to treat it. "Can you treat this condition, doc?" he whispers very silently, barely heard. "Well, I can run a few tests and try to figure it out," the doctor says. About an hour later the doctor says to the patient, "I have good news and bad news." "What's the good news?" the man whispers. "The good news is that we can cure it." "What's the bad news, doc?" "The bad news is that we'll have to amputate your penis," the doctor says. "Oh no, I can't do that. Never mind," the man murmurs as he left the room.