I thought up ALL OF THEESE. I am NOT duplicating anyone (except for 15 and 14, from the American 'Whose Line is it anyway?') So if you want a good "Fun things" and you don't want to keep seeing duplicates, read on. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 1.When the math teacher asks you a question, purposely answer incorrectly. Persist. See how long it keeps going. In my class, this really happened with a kid named Rahul. The teacher asked him how many centimeters were in a meter, and he kept on saying "1" and he kept it going for the rest of the period. ( 20 minutes!!! ) 2. When reading a book, scream, "NO! DON'T!!! LOOK OUT!" 3. Whenever you pick up a pencil, say the word "potato" or some other ra

A couple is sitting on the porch sipping wine. The wife says, "I love you." The husband says, "Is that you or the wine talking?" The wife replies, "It's me, talking to the wine."

Little Jimmy bit his fingernails all the time. His parents tried everything to get him to stop, but to no avail. Finally, his mother, exasperated, decided to tell him a little white lie to get him to stop. "Jimmy," she said, "You'd better stop biting your fingernails. If you don't, then those fingernails will pile up inside your stomach and soon your stomach will be huge and full of fingernails." Jimmy, worried about the idea of fingernails in his stomach, agreed to stop. The next day, Jimmy and his mom were shopping in a supermarket. They went to check out, and a pregnant woman was waiting in line in front of them. Jimmy beamed at the pregnant woman and said, "I know what YOU'VE been do

A horse and a rabbit are playing in a meadow. The horse falls into a mud hole and is sinking. He calls to the rabbit to go and get the farmer to help pull him out to safety. The rabbit runs to the farm but the farmer can't be found. So he drives the farmer's Mercedes back to the mud hole and ties some rope around the bumper. He then throws the other end of the rope to his friend, the horse, and drives the car forward saving him from sinking! A few days later, the rabbit and horse were playing in the meadow again and the rabbit fell into the mud hole. The rabbit yelled to the horse to go and get some help from the farmer. The horse said, "I think I can stand over the hole!" So he stretched o

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because he was attempting to cross it when yo mamma got hungry.

Two white horses fell in the mud and three came out.

A man walks into a pet store and asks for a German shepperd. The shopkeeper, replies that it will cost him $500. The man thinks for a minute, then asks how much a beware of dog sign costs. The shopkeeper calmly replies that it costs a whopping $1.98. The man thinks for a while longer, and asks for a beware of dog sign.

In a bi-partisan move, President Bush has nominated Dr. Hannibal Lecter as his candidate for US Surgeon General. "I think Dr. Lecter will serve with pride, fava beans, and a nice Chianti," Bush announced. In another announcement, Special Agent Clarice Starling will become the new FBI director. She's expected to work closely with the new Surgeon General on a case concerning missing former Vice President Al Gore. President Bush had recently arranged a meeting between Gore and Lecter. Lecter was the last person to see Gore before Gore's sudden disappearance in early January. Lecter noted that he, "enjoyed having Gore for dinner," but was upset at how Gore, or, rather the *subject* of Go

Justification for beer and ice cream! But stay away from the pizza! As we all know, it takes 1 calorie to heat 1 gram of water 1 degree centigrade. Translated into meaningful terms, this means that if you eat a very cold dessert (generally consisting of water in large part), the natural processes which raise the consumed dessert to body temperature during the digestive cycle literally suck the calories out of the only available source, your body fat. For example, a dessert served and eaten at near 0 degrees C (32.2 deg. F) will, in a short time, be raised to the normal body temperature of 37 degrees C (98.6 deg. F). For each gram of dessert eaten, that process takes approximately 37 calor

A guy walks into the Microsoft Shop. Guy: I'd like a cheesecake, please. Receptionist: Sure. The receptionist hands him a block of cheese. Guy: Umm... This is just the cheese. Where's the cake? Rec: You have to purchase that seperately. Guy: What the ----? What kind of product are you trying to sell me? Oh well. Rec: Good. I knew you'd understand. The Rec hands him the cake. Guy: So... What do I do with the cheese and the cake? Rec: You blend it. Guy: With what? The Rec hands him a blender. The guy puts the cheese and the cake into the blender and blends it. Guy: Now I have a bunch of liquid. What do I do with it? Rec: Oh ---- you retard, you're supposed to exchange the cake f

A man who smelled like a distillery flopped on a subway seat next to a priest. The man's tie was stained, his face was plastered with red lipstick, and a half empty bottle of gin was sticking out of his torn coat pocket. He opened his newspaper and began reading. After a few minutes, the disheveled guy turned to the priest and asked, "Say, Father, what causes arthritis?" "Mister, it's caused by loose living, being with cheap, wicked women, too much alcohol and a contempt for your fellow man." "Well I'll be," the drunk muttered, returning to his paper. The priest, thinking about what he had said, nudged the man and apologized. "I'm very sorry. I didn't mean to come on so strong. How long

How do you get a blonde to marry you? Tell her she's pregnant. What will be her response? "Is it mine?"