Dead Baby Jokes

Q: What's funnier than a dead baby? A: A dead baby in a clown costume! Q: What's the difference between a dead baby and a trampoline? A: When you jump on a trampoline, you take your boots off! Q: What's blue and flies around the room at high speeds? A: A baby with a punctured lung! Q: What do you call a dead baby with no arms and no legs in the middle of the ocean? A: Fucked! Q: How do you stop a baby crawling round in circles ? A: Nail its other hand to the floor! Q: What do you call a dead baby and 6 week old bread? A: A Big Mac! Q: How do you make a man pregnant? A: Stick a dead baby up his ass! Q: How many babies does it take to paint a house? A: Depends how hard you throw them! Q: What crawls on the floor and can't fit in an elevator? A: A baby with a javelin through it's head! Q: What's purple, covered in pus and squeals? A: A peeled baby in a bag of salt! Q: What's the difference between a bucket of gravel and a bucket of baby guts? A: You can't gargle gravel! Q: What gets louder as it gets smaller? A: A baby in a trash compactor! Q: What's the difference between a Dead Baby and a tree? A: One is legal to hit with an axe! Q: What do you get when you have sex with a pregnant woman? A: A baby with a black eye! Q: How do you get 100 babies into a bucket? A: With a blender! Q: How do you get them out again? A: With tortilla chips! Q: How many dead babies does it take to change a tire? A: Two, one to prop up the car and one to replace it incase it explodes! Q: What's white and red and hangs from a telephone wire? A: A baby shot through a snowblower! Q: What's red, pink, yellow, and on the bottom of the pool? A: A baby with slashed floaties! Q: What's green, black, yellow, and on the bottom of the pool! A: That same baby 3 weeks later! Q: What's the difference between a Lambourgini and a pile of dead babies? A: I don't have a Lambourgini in my garage!