Brad: I have to take three courses in college; French, Spanish, and algebra Chris: Okay, let me hear you say hi in algebra.

The best way to end a war is to surrender.

As part of a class project, the teacher had every student create a model rocket. When she was teaching them about how the rockets lift into the air, some kids seemed to be confused. She scolded them yelling, "It's not that hard! It's not rocket science!"

Are the Wocka ads annoying you? This is an updated version to tell you how to block them. It might take too long for you to reach the 5000 point milestone and therefore automatically get rid of the ads. If they do annoy you, here's a way to remove them: 1. Open "my computer", locate the windows directory (for example, C:\windows). 2. Enter its subdirectory system32\drivers\etc (the full path might be something like C:\windows\system32\drivers\etc). You can find a file named "host". 3. Use the "notepad" (which is being used to open .txt files) to open this file, and add these lines: 127.0.0.1 pagead2.googlesyndication.com 127.0.0.1 media.fastclick.net 127.0.0.1 www.burstnet.com 4. Save

I plan to be spontaneous - tomorrow. You know, if I looked like you, then I'd probably be plastering make-up on, too. You looked in a mirror lately? You're just jealous - weighing 10 stone is a big achievement. You remind me of a person I once knew. He was called the Hulk. If you are wondering why I'm napping, it's because you always want us to be wide awake. If I nap now, I'll be awake later. Now let me sleep. Well, well, well. Looks like the latest circus freak just escaped. Why am I in free dress? Well, that's the benefit of being the boss.

We all know the world war II games right?And they also have the Thompson gun which belongs to the Americans and British. There is a 2nd meaning. (Capital letters make for Thompson not just the beginning words.If you know what I mean) Thompson means:Theories Having Oatmeal Mayhem.Prefers to Sadness because Oatmeal is Numb. Capital letters are the letters of Thompson.

Premise I: Knowledge is power. Premise II: Power corrupts. Conclusion: Therefore, knowledge corrupts.

If 1/(x-8) approaches ∞ as x approaches 8 from above, then will 1/(x-3) approach ω as x approaches 3 from above?

During the famine of the civil war, a delegation of starving peasants comes to the Smolny, wishing to file a petition. "We have even started eating the grass like horses," says one peasant. "Soon we will start neighing like horses!" "Come on! Don't worry!" says Lenin reassuringly. "We are drinking tea with honey here, and we are not buzzing like bees, are we?"

"One day a friend of mine called me up to tell me he was thinking of buying a computer. This guy is particularly sensitive to criticism and not exactly in the upper echelon of the IQ range, and personally I don't think he should own a programmable VCR much less a computer, but he's a good guy, so I said "good for you." The following conversation ensued: * Him: "Well, I have a couple questions though, that I thought I should ask you, cause you know about those things, right?" * Me: "Yeah, ok, what do you want to know?" * Him: "Well . . . what one should I buy?" * Me: "What do you want to do with it mostly? Play games, word processsing (blah blah blah) . . .?" Twenty minutes

Silence is golden, because you never have to explain something you didn't say.

A guy walks into a bar and rudely demands a shot of 12-yr old scotch. The bartender thinks, "This guy doesn't know the difference," so he pours a shot of 2-year old scotch. The patron takes one sip and spits it out. He promptly hollers at the bartender, "I said 12-year old scotch, you bozo!" Still unimpressed, the bartender pours some 6-year old scotch. The patron takes a sip...same reaction. But the bartender still doesn't believe the patron knows the difference. So he pours a shot of 10-year old scotch. Again, same reaction from the patron. Finally, the bartender is convinced. He pours the patron a glass of 12-year-old scotch. The patron takes a sip and is most satisfied. All the wh