You are so small that on your ID picture, your feet showed.

Parent: You two should sing in the talent show together. Tim: When pigs fly! cindy: You fly?

You want me to write a joke!?!? The world is being attacked by aliens! AWWWWW! A warning; they have huge, hairy jaws and beady little eyes and long mangy hair and a huge nose and foul breath and and... oops. That's just you.

Ryan's teeth were so yellow that when he walked outside, the sun said give me my butter.

-Your mom is so fat, I rolled over twice and I was still on top of her. -Your mom is so fat, you need a Thomas Guide to find her asshole. -Your mom is so fat, when she falls out of bed she falls on both sides. -Your mom is so fat, when she wears a yellow coat she looks like a school bus. -Your mom is so fat, she has her own zip code. -Your mom is so fat, she plays hopscotch like this: California, Nevada, Arizona... -Your mom is so fat, when her beeper goes off people think she's backing up. -Your mom is so fat, when she sits around the house, she literally sits around the house. -Your mom is so fat, when she goes to the beach, people yell out, "Whale Sighting!" -Your mom is so fat, we get a

Ok here are a few: I will try to be nicer if you try to be smarter. Don't flatter yourself. I was looking at your friend. I don't know what makes you so dumb, but it's really working. Stupidity is not a crime, so you are free to go. If I throw a stick, will you go away? Warning: I am hearing voices and they don't like you. Stupidity is a right but you are abusing the privilege. Your mouth keeps moving but all I hear is bla, bla, bla. On your mark, get set, go away. I would like to help you out. Which way did you come in?

Boy: Did it hurt? Girl: Did what hurt? Boy: When you fell from heaven. Girl: Aww, did it hurt when you got kicked out of hell? Boy: If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put U and I together. Girl: Really? If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put F and U together.

I'm the kind of person who laughs at a joke three times: Once it's told, once it's explained, and 5 minutes later once I get it.

here is a link to the joke http://miamistreetracing.com/forum/v...d.php?tid=2385

Don't think of yourself as an ugly person, think of yourself as a really pretty monkey.

Boys are like public toilets; they're either taken, or full of crap. (no offense to you boys)

your daddies so old, i slapped his butt and his balls fell off