A West German businessman is driving a Mercedes through East Germany on a rainy night when his windshield wipers stop working. He takes it to an East German mechanic, who tells him there are no Mercedes windshield wiper motors in the GDR, but he will do his best to fix it. When the businessman returns the next day, to his surprise the windshield wipers are working perfectly. "How did you find a Mercedes windshield wiper motor in the East?" he asks the mechanic. "We didn't," replies the mechanic, "We used the engine motor of a Trabant."

Why are there so many bananas in the West? Because the Westerners are descended from apes.

What's the difference between a Western necktie and a cow's tail? The cow's tail covers the whole asshole.

At the peak of the wave of East Germans fleeing through Hungary and Czechoslovakia in 1989, the persons still staying in East Germany (DDR) were called the "Der Dumme Rest" (the dumb remains).

What do you get when you cross an Ossi with a Wessi? An arrogant unemployed person.

Q: How can you tell that an elephant is in the bathtub with you? A: By the smell of peanuts on its breath.

Q: Why do elephants paint their toes yellow? A: So they can hide upside down in the custard.

Q: What did the Dallas chief of police say when the elephant walked into the police station? A: Nothing! He didn't notice.

Q: Why do elephants have big ears? A: Because Noddy would not pay the ransom!

Q: How do you shoot a blue elephant? A: With a blue elephant gun.

Q: How do you shoot a yellow elephant? A: Have you ever seen a yellow elephant?

Q: How do you shoot a red elephant? A: Hold his trunk shut until he turns blue, and then shoot him with the blue elephant gun.