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Knock Knock Who's there? Boo Boo who? I don't know, but stop your crying!
Saint Peter asked the new arrival, "And what bad things did you do while you were on Earth?" The man thought a moment. "Well, I smoked marijuana, but you shouldn't hold that against me because I didn't inhale, and I had some extra-marital sex, but you shouldn't hold that against me because I didn't technically have "sexual relations". I lied some, but you shouldn't hold that against me because I never committed perjury." Saint Peter looked concerned. "Okay, here's the deal," said Saint Peter. "We'll send you someplace very hot, but we won't call it 'Hell'. You'll be there for an indefinite time, but we won't call it 'eternity,' and you don't need to 'abandon all hope' upon entering, but don
There once was a village, it was powerful and had the strongest warriors, one day, a tourist goes to them and says they were cowards, they yelled and beat him, but finally, the tourist said, "This book says that the Paccachu are selfish people who steal, and are cannibals." The villagers looking at the book scream and run around the village. One man however, looks at the book and laughs. The man stays where he is and doesn't panic like his fellow village. The tourist, finally gathering enough courage asks him, "How come your not scared?" The man smirks and replies, "I can't read."
Early one morning, the milkman was doing his rounds. He stopped at a house to ask for his monthly fee, only to find a small boy at the door slurping from a beer bottle, smoking a Havana cigar, and with his arm around what appeared to be a call-girl. Surprised, the milkman asked the boy if his parents were home. "Does it fucking look like it?"
An old couple is on a walk, when a pigeon flies by and relieves himself on the woman's head. "Yech!" says the woman. "Get some toilet paper." "What for?" says the man. "He must be half-a-mile away by now."
Teacher: John, where are the Great Plains? John: At the airport.
Are the Wocka ads annoying you? This is an updated version to tell you how to block them. It might take too long for you to reach the 5000 point milestone and therefore automatically get rid of the ads. If they do annoy you, here's a way to remove them: 1. Open "my computer", locate the windows directory (for example, C:\windows). 2. Enter its subdirectory system32\drivers\etc (the full path might be something like C:\windows\system32\drivers\etc). You can find a file named "host". 3. Use the "notepad" (which is being used to open .txt files) to open this file, and add these lines: 127.0.0.1 pagead2.googlesyndication.com 127.0.0.1 media.fastclick.net 127.0.0.1 www.burstnet.com 4. Save
One there was a wrestler in a very, very light weight wrestling match. He only weighed 135 pounds and his opponent even less than that. He was just about to wrestle that day when his coach dragged him off the ring. "I need to speak with him," the coach called. "Why'd you take me out?" asked the wrestler, nervous. "What did I do?" "Calm down. I don't think you're fit to beat your opponent." "Yeah, well, I doubt it, Coach. I could carry that guy in the palm of my hand. He only weighs 85 pounds, maybe 90." "Yes, but he has a lot of muscle!"
During taxi, the crew of a US AIR departure flight to Ft. Lauderdale made a wrong turn and came nose to nose with a United 727. The irate ground controller (a female) screamed, "US Air 2771, where are you going? I told you to turn right on 'Charlie' taxiway; you turned right on 'Delta.' Stop right there! I know it's difficult to tell the difference between C's & D's, but try to get it right!" Continuing her tongue lashing to the embarrassed crew, she was now shouting hysterically, "God, you've screwed everything up; it'll take forever to sort this out. You stay right there and don't move until I tell you to! Then I want you to go exactly where I tell you, when I tell you, and how I tel
1. Insist that you are a vegetarian and protest anytime your roommate eats meat. Then leave "Slim Jim" wrappers on the floor and lie on the bed holding your stomach every time your roommate walks in. If he/she asks about the wrappers, say you know nothing about them. 2. Get some hair. Disperse it around your roommate's head while he/she is asleep. Keep a pair of scissors by your bed. Snicker at your roommate every morning. 3. Every time your roommate walks in yell, "Hooray! You're back!" as loud as you can and dance around the room for five minutes. Afterwards, keep looking at your watch and saying, "Shouldn't you be going now?" 4. Trash the room when your roommate's not around. Then leav
Before creating an article, please read Wikipedia:Your first article, or search for an existing article to which you can redirect this title. To experiment, please use the sandbox. As you create the article, provide references to reliable published sources. Without references, the article may be deleted. Notice: You are re-creating a page that was deleted. You should consider whether it is appropriate to continue editing this page. Information is available on what to do if a page you created is deleted. The deletion log for this page is provided here for convenience: 12:10, 13 October 2007 Sam Blacketer (Talk | contribs) deleted "Bushit" ‎ (Criteria G10: attack page.) 23:56, 15 Ma
What do you call a dog in the sun? A Hot Dog!
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