Little Brother: How long is a strong? Big Sister: Huh? Little Brother: Well, I've heard of a week...

Conserve water and electricity, shower with a steamy hot friend.

A blonde's boyfriend, planning to stop at the bakery says, "I'm going to go pick up a blondie. I want a smoking hot fresh one." The blonde replies, "Well, then we're over. Go ahead and get a new girlfriend. A nice blondie!"

Yo momma so fat, she cut herself and bled gravy!

Yo momma's lips are so big, she made Angelina Jolie jealous!

Philip is telling his friends about his recent divorce. "Yes, it's true. Sylvie divorced me for religious reasons. She worshipped money and I didn't have any."

Yo momma's breath smells so bad, her teeth duck when she yawns!

A recent immigrant had just completed a training course titled, 'Improve your English' and was taking an oral exam. The examiner asked him to spell 'cultivate.' Jacob spelled it correctly. The examiner then asked Jacob to use the word 'cultivate' in a sentence. Jacob thought about it for a while, then replied, "Last winter, on a very cold day, I was waiting for the bus but it was too cultivate so I walked home."

Yo momma's so ugly, you can press her face in some dough and make gorilla cookies!

Yo momma so ugly she made an onion cry.

Yo momma so ugly the plastic surgeon sued her.

Yo momma so ugly she made a mime scream.