This Chinese man asks this guy what he does for a living. The guy says, 'I'm a comedian.' The Chinese guy says 'No, u no camedien!' The guy says, 'Yer, I am, honest.' The Chinese guy says, 'No, you're not, ploove it, change coror!' (He says it like chameleon)

What's Hitlers least favorite planet? 'Jewpiter'

How do you get 100 jews into a car? Throw a quarter in it. How do you get them out again? Tell them Hilter is driving.

A man walks into a restaurant, and asks the waiter: Man: Waiter, how much is a cup of coffee? Waiter: 50 cents, sir. Man: How much are refills? Waiter: They are free. Man: That's nice, I'll have a refill, please.

How do you know you have a queer Jew? He likes money more than girls.

Have you heard about the Jewish sports car? It stops on a dime, then picks it up

Whats the object of Jewish football? To get the quarter back.

Why did the Jews walk around the desert for 40 years? They heard that someone dropped a quarter

What happens when a Jew with an erection walks into a wall? He breaks his nose.

What's faster than a speeding bullet? A jew with a coupon.

What's a Black Priest called? Holy Shit!

1. Ride on the baggage claim machine and go around in circles, don't leave until security comes. 2. Ride on those carts and pretend you're in the Batmobile. 3. When checking in, and the attendant takes your baggage and puts it into the machine say you left your passport, bag, purse, flight ticket etc. in there, when they take back the luggage, say you found it in your wallet. 4. Ask for Snerples while on the plane and insist you must have one. 5. Ask where the airport is in the information stand. 6. If you are sitting next to a kid on a plane, point out that you just saw a UFO come by. 7. When the plane is airborne, tell the flight attendant you got on the wrong flight. 8. Pretend to