A co-worker of mine fielded phone calls from his Alumni Association every three months for about five years, ostensibly checking to see that his records were up to date, and coincidentally asking if he'd like to donate to the Alumni Association. Once, when checking his records, the employee asked, "Is xxx-xxxx your current phone number?" Seeing his opportunity, he answered no, and made up a new phone number. He hasn't heard from them since.

The song, "Yankee Doodle" was originally sung by British soldiers to insult the colonialists (which was typical of the British in those days). The Continental Army took to singing it to annoy the British (which was typical of the colonialists).

St. Paul, MN The hit movie "Home Alone" about a boy thwarting burglars with imaginative mayhem, wasn't total fantasy. Just ask the guy who tried to break in while 13-year-old Ryan Hendrickson was home alone. Ryan was watching television Wednesday night when he heard a noise that sounded like a window screen being cut. "I ran to the closet and grabbed a bat," Ryan said Thursday. "I went...into the dining room, where I saw him cutting the window with a knife. He put his left hand in first and I was waiting for his right hand to come in...and I took the baseball bat and I hit him as hard as I could." The man ran. Ryan called 911. Police, while cautioning Ryan to call 911 first next time, d

New York, NY Police across the nation are warning people who wear pagers to be on the lookout for the latest scam. According to police, pagers in several states have been beeped by a number displaying a 212 area code (New York) and the prefix 540. When the victims return the call, they are charged $55 on their phone bill. The call the respondent makes has been electronically linked into a 900 "pay-per-call" system which allows the charge to be added to the phone bill. "People will look at the number and say 'Gee, who is calling me from out of state? It must be important,'" said an investigator.

Bellevue, WA There's a story circulating through the Bellevue School District about the woman who called wanting information on home schooling. Both Lake Washington (Renton, WA) and Bellevue districts are noted for their support of home schoolers, and the Bellevue spokesperson was explaining procedures and what to do to the mother on the telephone. Among other things, the mother needed to file a declaration of intent, a kind of home school registration. The spokeswoman offered to send out the proper form. The mother gave a Renton address. The spokeswoman suggested registering the children in her home district in Renton, the Lake Washington School District. "No way," said the mother. "E

Kenneth Jeffries, 24, was arrested in West Haven, Conn., in August for robbing a convenience store. Police reported that he had first offered the clerk $1 for a pack of gum as a ruse and then taken $40 in the robbery. However, said police, Jeffries returned a minute later and asked, uncertainly, "Did I pay for the gum?" By that time the clerk had summoned police, and Jeffries was soon apprehended.

Three roommates: a blonde, brunette, and redhead all go out on dates one night. When they get back in the blonde says, "You know you've been on a good date when your make-up is all smeared!" The brunette says, "No, no, you know you've been on a good date when you come home and your hair is all messed up." The redhead doesn't say anything she just reaches up under her skirt, pulls off her panties, and throws them against the wall, where they stick, and says, "NOW THAT'S A GOOD DATE!!"

So, what did one Bowling pin say to the other Bowling pin? ............................ Hey, you're a knock out!

One day a pretty lady was driving through the desert and her car broke down. In the distance, she sees an indian riding a horse. He rides over to her and offers her a lift to the nearest gas station and she happily accepts. On the way to the gas station, the indian would let out a, "Woo Hoo, Yipee!" every few seconds. The lady just figured that he was being an Indian and ignored it. When they finally got to the gas station and the Indian had left, the guy that worked at the gas station asked, "What was his problem?" The lady responded, "I don't know, I was just holding onto his saddle horn." The guy replied, "Lady, Indians don't use saddles!"

Did you hear about the magic car? It turned into a driveway!

My health teacher said once he was talking to this one guy and a student. As they were talking the student got curious and asked, "How long have you been teaching here?" My health teachser replied, "Oh about 37 years." The student said he must be old and the other guy, who is elderly as well says, "Ya, and Jesus still owes me a buck."

How many Price Chopper employees does it take to wash a table? Three; one to wash it and two to supervise.