My home town is so small, we have part-time village idiot.

Yo momma is like a lollipop, she is round and has been licked by everyone

Yo momma is so stupid, she thought Fruit Punch was a gay boxer

Yo Momma is so dumb, she was on her way to the airport and saw a sign that said, "Airport Left" so she turned around and went home

Yo Momma is so stupid, she has a peep hole in the glass door!

Yo momma is so short, she stepped in a puddle and drowned.

Yo momma is so poor, she has never seen 50 cent--and ! ain't talkin about the rapper!

1.) Lost: small apricot poodle. Reward. Neutered. Like one of the family. 2.) A superb and inexpensive restaurant. Fine food expertly served by waitresses in appetizing forms. 3.) Dinner Special -- Turkey $2.35; Chicken or Beef $2.25; Children $2.00. 4.) For sale: an antique desk suitable for lady with thick legs and large drawers. 5.) Four-poster bed, 101 years old. Perfect for antique lover. 6.) Now is your chance to have your ears pierced and get an extra pair to take home, too. 7.) Wanted: 50 girls for stripping machine operators in factory. 8.) Wanted: Unmarried girls to pick fresh fruit and produce at night. 9.) We do not tear your clothing with machinery. We do it care

It was about a month ago when a man in Amsterdam felt that he needed to confess, so went to his priest: "Forgive me Father, for I have sinned. During WWII I hid a refugee in my attic." "Well," answered the priest, "that's not a sin." "But I made him agree to pay me 20 Gulden for every week he stayed." "I admit that wasn't good, but you did it for a good cause." "Oh, thank you, Father; that eases my mind. I have one more question..." "What is that, my son?" "Do I have to tell him the war is over?"

The following are actual church bulletin board bloopers found in churches across the United States. Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles, and other items to be recycled. Proceeds will be used to cripple children. The outreach committee has enlisted 25 visitors to make calls on people who are not afflicted with any church. Evening massage - 6 p.m. The Pastor would appreciate it if the ladies of the congregation would lend him their electric girdles for the pancake breakfast next Sunday morning. The audience is asked to remain seated until the end of the recession. Low Self-Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7 to 8:30 p.m. Please use the back door. Ushers will eat late

Yo momma is so poor, she reuses her toilet paper.

Yo momma is so fat, on her drivers' license it says, "picture continued onto other side."