Yo mama is so fat she used Saturn's rings as hoola-hoops!

What are two blondes doing in front of a motorcycle? Arguing about who get a window seat.

What do you call a smart blond? An Endangered species

What do you call a movie about a man trying to make a blond smart? Mission Impossible

There are 99 Blonds on a plane and 1 Brunette. The captain radios in that they are going down, So they drop all the luggage. They were still going down so they drop out all the chairs. They were still going down so they dropped the floor. So they are hanging by their hands from the top on the plane with no floor. So the captain say's "1 person jump out" the Brunette say's "I'll sacrifice my life", and all the Blonds start clapping.

Why do blondes climb chain-link fences? To see what's on the other side.

Why does a blond wear a tight skirt? To keep her legs closed

What is more stupid then a brunette trying to start a fire in a pool? A blonde trying to put it out.

What do you call an intelligent blonde? A Golden Retriever

A blonde is on the road when suddenly she gets a phonecall from her friend: "Watch out! I heard on the radio that some lunatic is going against traffic!" So the blonde says, "Only one? They all are!"

How many Dyslexics does it take to change a Lit Blub?

Anyone remember Roy Clark, host of TV's "Hee Haw"? Once, cohost Buck Owens was visiting Roy's home in the foothills of the Rocky Mountains. Roy was upset because he had just bought a beautiful new pair of genuine leather boots that were completely destroyed by a mountain lion the night before when Roy had left them on the back porch. Roy was bound and determined to get the animal, so he and Buck, and several townspeople, took up arms and searched the hills. The group searched for hours to no avail. Then suddenly, Buck heard a feline wail. Buck turns to his friend and sings: "Pardon me Roy, is that the cat that chewed your new shoes?"