Top Jokes
How does Clinton divert his attention from the latest controversy?
He just keeps on plugging away.
Q. What goes clop... clop... clop... BANG! clop clop clop clop clop clop?
A. An Amish driveby
I'm the kind of person who laughs at a joke three times: Once it's told, once it's explained, and 5 minutes later once I get it.
It's pretty bad if you start typing "lol" as if it were a sentence (Lol.)
Its worse if you start saying, "laugh out loud" in everday conversations.
It's absolutely horrible if you actually say, "l-o-l."
What is the difference between Jesus and a picture of Jesus?
It only takes one nail to hang a picture of Jesus.
1 How do you make a blonde laugh on Saturday?
Tell her a joke on Wednesday.
2 What is the blonde doing when she holds her hands tightly over her ears?
Trying to hold on to a thought.
3 Why don't blondes have elevator jobs?
They don't know the route.
4 Have you heard what my blond neighbor wrote on the bottom of her swimming pool?
No smoking.
5 How do you drive a blonde crazy?
Give her a bag of M&Ms and tell her to alphabetize them.
6 Do you know why the blonde got fired from the M&M factory?
For throwing out the W's.
7 How did the blonde die drinking milk?
The cow fell on her.
8 Why do blondes like lightning?
They think someone is taking their picture.
9 Why don't blo
1 A dumb blonde was bragging about her knowledge of the state capitals of the United States. She proudly announced, "Go ahead, ask me any of the capitals, I know all of them."
A red head said, "O.K., what's the capital of Wyoming?" The blonde replied, "Oh, that's easy, 'W'."
2 A blonde was telling her priest a Polack joke, when halfway through the priest interrupts her, "Don't you know I'm Polish?"
"Oh, I'm sorry," the blonde apologizes, "do you want me to start over and talk slower?"
3 A dumb blonde was standing in front of a soda machine outside of a local store. After putting in sixty cents, a root beer popped out of the machine. She set it on the ground, put sixty more cents into th
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