Knock-knock. Who's there? Dishes. Dishes who? Dishes me, who's you? (This is me, who's you.)

It is illegal to stick coins in your ears in the state of Hawaii.

Why were the police at the baseball game? Because someone stole second base!

Yo momma is so fat and dumb, she used Antarctica as a popsicle!

yo mommo so stupid when she was drowning, she ate a Lifesaver. Lifesaver is a candy.

If the cops arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?

Darwin's Answer: It was the logical next step after coming down from the trees. Another of Darwin's Answers: Chickens, over great periods of time, have been naturally selected in such a way that they are now genetically disposed to cross roads. Johnny Cochran 's Answer: Because the road was black and the chicken was white. We must acquit. Snoop Dogg 's Answer: This (censored) fool of a chicken didn't (censored) know what the (censored) he was doin crossin a (censored) alley in (censored) Harlem at 1:00 in the (censored) mornin'. Bill Cosby 's Answer: Weeelll, ya see, the chicken crossed the road, and to get... to...the jello pudding pops. Homer Simpson 's Answer: There was free beer on

100,000 Sperm And You Were The Fastest?

Always keep your words soft and sweet, just in case you have to eat them.

Famous last words: "Ok, I'm only going to have one..." -- Said the polygamist right after marrying his first wife.

Yo momma is so fat, whenever she turns around--there goes another city. Yo momma is so fat, whenever she sits down she lowers all the prices at wal-mart. Yo momma is so fat, whenever she turns around it's your birthday. Yo momma is so fat, NASA engineers mistook her for a new planet. Yo momma is so fat, it takes 1000 years to design clothes for her Yo momma is so fat, whenever she gets weighed she breaks the scale. You're so fat, I wonder if it's because of yo momma.

You might be a redneck if your dad bought you a gallon of Pepto-Bismol for Christmas.