What key opens no lock? A Monkey!

What key opens no lock? A Turkey!

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven ate nine!

The Hodja (teacher) was selling olives at the market and business was slow. He called to a woman who was passing by and tried to entice her. She shook her head and told him she didn't have any money with her."No problem," the Hodja grinned. "You can pay me later." She still looked hesitant, so he offered her one to taste. "Oh no, I can't, I'm fasting," she responded. "Fasting? But Ramadan was 6 months ago!" "Yes, well, I missed a day and I'm making it up now. Go ahead and give me a kilo of the black olives." "Forget it!" shouted the Hodja. "If it took you 6 months to pay back a debt you owed ALLAH, who knows when you'll get around to paying me!"

There was a big moron and a little moron, sitting on a ledge. The big moron fell off. Why? Because the little moron was a little more on.

Don't let your mind wander. It's too small to be out on its own.

Cathy was looking through the window of a clothes store when she spotted a pair of short-shorts. "Wow, these pants are half off!" she told her uncle. Her uncle said "They should be, they are only a half pair of pants."

What's the difference between an ice-cream? - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - A motorcycle, it has no wheels. - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Hehe, you should have seen your face!!!

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After a long, dry sermon, the minister announced that he wished to meet with the church board after the service. The first man to arrive was a stranger. "You misunderstood my announcement. This is a meeting of the board," said the minister. "I know," said the man. "If there is anyone here more bored than I am, I'd like to meet him."

Why were the teacher's eyes crossed? She couldn't control her pupils!

Lisa was playing bowling with her friend Marie. Lisa got a strike, then one more strike. Then, she got another strike. She had just gotten 3 strikes in a row! "I just got 3 strikes in a row!" said Lisa. Marie said, "You're out, you just got 3 strikes in a row!"