Popular Jokes
In the city of Gilacopa during the year of 1832 there was a great poet. He wrote some of the most beautiful poems the world had ever known. One day his assistant was in his office and he noticed a sheet of paper on his desk and he figured it must of been the poets newest work.
The assistant could not understand the poem so he took it over to the neighbor whom was much wiser than he. The neighbor looked at the poem and declared, "It is clearly a tribute to the troops in Iraq", but this could not be so since this was the 1830's and there was no war in Iraq yet, so they took the poem to the psychologist who was much wiser than they.
The pychologist looked at this and said, "This is obviously
Ok, now the last time I did this, I got a lot of comments saying that there's no point, and they only submit things they think is funny and blah blah blah.
Well, anyways, I'm planning to do this.... again.. and by the way, I think it'd be extremely funny.
Everyone, please give this a full smiley. Sooner or later, this is going to become the highest rated "joke". I figured it'd be extremely funny if the highest rated joke, wasn't even a joke at all...
Thanks a billion for your cooperation!!
Why are golf balls small and white?
Because if they were big and grey they would be elephants.
A Scottish Presbyterian is rescued after many years on a desert island. As he stands on the deck of the rescuing vessel, the captain says to him, "I thought you were stranded alone. How come I can see three huts on the beach?"
- "Well," replies the castaway, "that one there is my house and that one there is where I go to church."
- "And the third one?" asks the skipper.
- "Oh, that's my old church."
"Pass me the shellfish," said Tom crabbily.
"That's the last time I'll stick my arm in a lion's mouth," the lion-tamer said off-handedly.
"Can I go looking for the Grail again?" Tom requested.
"I unclogged the drain with a vacuum cleaner," Tom said succinctly.
"I might as well be dead," Tom croaked.
"We just struck oil!" Tom gushed.
"They had to amputate them both at the ankles," Tom said defeatedly.
"Who discovered radium?" asked Marie curiously.
"Hurry up and get to the back of the ship," Tom said sternly.
If I'm canoeing up a tree, how many cupcakes does it take to get to the moon?
None, since vests don't have sleeves.
Nick's Grandma gave him a map to her house. The address was 1767 Old Miffs Road.
Nick traveled till he got to Old Miffs road. He didn't pay attention to the sign and thought he was lost.
He stopped at a woman's house and she opened the door. "Why hello there!" the woman said. "Nice to see you, Nick."
Nick couldn't hear her, so he asked "Do you know where 1767 Old Miffs Road is?"
"You're here," she said, but Nick still couldn't hear her.
He went to a different house down the road. He asked "Do you know where 1767 Old Miffs Road is?"
"Yes, it's right there."
"This isn't Old Miffs Road!"
"Pay attention to street signs."
A 6'4" man hit a midget in the rear while at a red light.
The midget gets out of his car and comes up to the man and says, "I'm NOT happy!" and the man replied, "Which one are you, then?"
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