This poem is for every guy who has a girl who wants poetry and songs devoted entirely to them ;) ( Sung to row row row my boat ) Suck, suck, suck my cock suck my god damn cock blow it hard you fucking 'tard suck my god damn cock! Please, if this offends you don't read it, no need to comment on how horrid it is, this is not every one's brand of humor . . .

One day, I was about to tell my 'Micky Mouse is Mad' joke to my friends, when I get to the part "Mickey Mouse was in the Divorce court..." One of my friends interrupted me and started yelling... "But why is it Mickey Mouse? Why not Steamboat Willie? Or George?" Losing interest, I noticed there was a post-it on my backpack. I threw it to my second friend. He opened it and read 'Fluffy?', and threw it to my first friend droning on and on and on and on and on and.... He said this. "Why is Steamboat Willie the same as Mickey Mouse? Steamboat Willie is a boat driver and Mickey Mouse does NOTHING. He just sits around being all-" then he got the post-it. "FLUFFY? He just sits around being FLUFFY?"

A Chinese family of four was eating fried rice for dinner. As always, the half-blind father was last. Thinking that nobody will care if he throws his food out, he does so, as he sees an empty garbage can. The next morning his wife says to him: "Honey, while you were eating dinner I took the garbage out, and now some ee-diot left crap in the box. Please clean it up"

Good morning is a contradiction in terms.

You know what? Everybody is screwed these days. In the office, you're screwed if you don't do you're job well. At home, You're screwed if you don't listen to your parents. At school/college, You're screwed by many- Teachers, bullies, the principal etc... And they say we're all screwed on December 21st 2012! But, these things don't bother me. The one thing that makes me mad is when I'm looking for a virgin and they're ALL screwed!

What trees do in Spring. (re-leaf)

Q: Why do elephants have big ears? A: Because Noddy would not pay the ransom!

Q: What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? A: Their color.

This site is dead. There has been an all-time low in traffic. No one posts anymore. The end of the site is a tragic one, and I will miss the site. Wocka has fallen from its high branch. Submit your hate towards, but you know it's true.

Dear Abby, I have never written to you before, but I really need your advice. I have suspected for some time now that my wife has been cheating on me. The usual signs; phone rings but if I answer, the caller hangs up. My wife has been going out with 'the girls' a lot recently although when I ask their names she always says, just some friends from work, you don't know them. I try to stay awake and watch for her when she comes home, but I usually fall asleep. Anyway, I have never broached the subject with my wife. I think deep down I just did not want to know the truth, but last night she went out again and I decided to finally check on her around midnight, I hid in the garage behind my gol

Is anybody STILL ALIVE ON WOCKA?????? I KNOW THIS ISNT A JOKE BUT THIS WAY THE ONLY WAY TO GET YOUR ATTENTION! HELLOOOO.... WAS THAT AN ECHO ECHO ECHO?

Take a look at these 45 items and see if you find yourself relating and laughing until it hurts! More often than not, when someone is telling me a story all I can think about is that I can't wait for them to finish so that I can tell my own story that's not only better, but also more directly involves me. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong. Have you ever been walking down the street and realized that you're going in the complete opposite direction of where you are supposed to be going? But instead of just turning a 180 and walking back in the direction from which you came, you have to first do something like check your watch or phone or ma