Questions that have Confused humankind!! Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?" Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken there....I'm gonna eat the next thing that comes outta its butt." Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat? Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer? If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him? Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane? If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a

How Smart Is Your Right Foot? This is so funny that it will boggle your mind, and you will keep trying it at least 50 more times to see if you can outsmart your foot - but you can't! 1. While sitting at your desk, lift your right foot off the floor and make clockwise circles with it. 2. Now, while doing this, draw the number "6" in the air with your right hand.. Your foot will change direction! I told you so.. And there is nothing you can do about it!

The following list of phrases and their definitions might help you understand the fuzzy language of science and medicine. These special phrases are also applicable to anyone reading a PhD dissertation or academic paper. "It has long been known..." I didn't look up the original reference. "A definite trend is evident..." These data are practically meaningless. "While it has not been possible to provide definitive answers to the questions..." An unsuccessful experiment but I still hope to get it published. "Three of the samples were chosen for detailed study..." The other results didn't make any sense. "Typical results are shown..." This is the prettiest graph. "These results will be in

I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, "Where's the self-help section?" She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose.

A terrible diet and room with no ventilation are being blamed for the death of a man who was killed by his own gas. There was no mark on his body but autopsy showed large amounts of methane gas in his system. His diet had consisted primarily of beans and cabbage(and a couple of other things). It was just the right combination of foods. It appears that the man died in his sleep from breathing the poisonous cloud that was hanging over his bed. Had he been outside or had his windows been opened, it wouldn't have been fatal. But the man was shut, up in his, near airtight bedroom. According to the article, "He was a big man with a huge capacity for creating 'this deadly gas'." Three of the res

(Washington DC) Two men tried to pull the front off a cash machine by running a chain from the machine to the bumper of their pickup truck. Instead of pulling the front panel off the machine, though, they pulled the bumper off their truck. Scared, they left the scene and drove home. With the chain still attached to the machine. With their bumper still attached to the chain. With their vehicle's license plate still attached to the bumper. (Virginia) A man walked into a local police station, dropped a bag of cocaine on the counter, informed the desk sergeant that it was substandard cut, and asked that the person who sold it to him be arrested immediately. (Washington DC) A man walked up to a c

THINGS TO DO AT A BORING MOVIE: 1. Wear a top hat and make sure you sit in front of kids. 2. Throw popcorn in the air and yell, "It's snowing!" 3. Go, "Oooooh..." whenever anyone kisses. 4. Clap when the good guy gets killed. 5. Make a noise like your passing gas and go, "Ahhh..." 6. Starting wheezing and ask the person next to you if you can have some Juicy Fruits for your asthma. 7. During the previews, yell, "Can you fast-forward it?" 8. Whenever the bad guy is doing something devoius, say, "Watch out!" 9. Laugh very loudly at all the corny jokes. 10. Tell the man selling popcorn that the girls bathroom is flooding. 11. Yell out what is going to happen. 12. Tell the man next to you that y

A newlywed sailor is informed by the navy that he's going to be stationed a long way from home on a remote island in the South Pacific for 2 years. A few weeks after he gets there he really starts to miss his new wife, so he writes her a letter. "My darling," he writes, "it looks like we're going to be apart for a very long time. Already I'm starting to miss you and we're constantly surrounded by young, attractive native girls. The temptation's terrible. I need some kind of hobby to keep my mind off them." His wife sends him back a harmonica with a note reading, "Why don't you learn to play this?" Eventually his tour of duty comes to an end and he rushes back to his wife. "Darling" he say

In 1634, tulip bulbs were a form of currency in Holland. A male kangaroo is called a boomer. Penguins have an organ above their eyes that converts sea water to fresh water. Bamboo makes up 99% of a panda's diet. The first human-made object to break the sound barrier was a whip. Beavers were once the size of bears. The first ballpoint pens were sold in 1945 for $12.00 each.

A single coffee tree produces only about a pound of coffee beans a year. The only bird that can swim but not fly is the penguin. The tallest man was 8'11" The first vacuum was so large; it was brought to a house by horse. A female kangaroo is called a flyer.

Sign on the inside of a bathroom stall: "Beware of limbo dancers." A hardware store in Oregon has a sign that reads: "Today's special." Below, it says: "So's tomorrow." Sign in school: "In case of atomic attack, the federal ruling concerning prayer in this building will be temporarily suspended." Sign seen on an electricity pylon: "DANGER! To touch these wires will result in instant death. Anyone found doing so will be severely prosecuted." Sign at a garage in Hertfordshire: "Please do not smoke near the pumps. If your life isn't worth anything, gas is!" Sign seen in the vicinity of Victoria Station: "Closed for official opening."

60 The famous British one-eyed Admiral was Nelson 61 The earlier name of Sri Lanka was Ceylon 62 The UNO was formed in the year 1945 63 UNO stands for United Nations Organisation 64 The independence day of South Korea is celebrated on 15th August 65 `Last Judgement'was the first painting of an Italian painter named Michelangelo 66 'Paradise Regained' was written by John Milton 67 The first President of Egypt was Mohammed Nequib 68 The first man to reach North Pole was Rear Admiral Peary 69 The most famous painting of Pablo Picasso was Guernica 70 The primary producer of newsprint in the world is Canada 71 The first explorer to reach the South Pole was Cap. Ronald Amundson 72 The person who i