Popular Jokes
There is a very simple way to explain the theory of mind over matter.
Once you lose you mind, nothing matters.
On June 10th, 2006, San Fransisco, California held the largest gay, nude bike ride in the United States. I'm never buying a used bike ever again.
"They misunderestimate me." -Nov. 6, 2000
"Rarely is the question asked: Is out children learning?" -Jan. 11, 2000
"I aim to be a competitive nation." -April 21, 2006
Morris, as a young man in the Old West, wanted to be the best gunfighter alive. One night as he was sitting in a saloon, he spotted an old man who had the reputation of being the greatest gunfighter in his day. So Morris walked up to the old man and told him his dream. The old man looked him up and down and said, "I have a suggestion that is sure to help."
"Tell me, tell me," said the young man.
"Tie the bottom of your holster lower onto your leg."
"Will that make me a better gunfighter?"
"Definitely," said the old man.
Young Morris did what he was told and drew his gun and shot the bow tie off the piano player. "Wow, that really helped. Do you have any more suggestions?"
"Yeah,
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Green Star~~~= User has submitted 5 jokes.
Red Star~~~~~= User has submitted 10 jokes.
Blue Star~~~~= User has submitted 50 jokes.
Glod Star~~~~= User has submitted 100 jokes.
Rainbow Star~= User has submitted 200 jokes.
Red Dot~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~= User has cast 10 votes.
Small Dartboard~~~~~~~~~= User has cast 50 votes.
Medium Dartboard~~~~~~~~= User has cast 100 votes.
Large Dartboard~~~~~~~~~= User has cast 250 votes.
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Dartboard with 2 Arrow
Psychiatrist: What's your problem?
Patient: I think I'm a chicken.
Psychiatrist: How long has this been going on?
Patient: Ever since I was an egg!
On my way home from the second job I've taken for the extra
holiday ca$h I need, I stopped at Taco Bell for a quick bite
to eat. In my billfold is a $50 bill and a $2 bill. That is
all of the cash I have on my person. I figure that with a $2
bill, I can get something to eat and not have to worry about
people getting mad at me.
Me: "Hi, I'd like one seven layer burrito please, to go."
Server: "Is that it?"
Me: "Yep."
Server: "That'll be $1.04, eat here?"
Me: "No, it's *to* *go*." [I hate effort duplication.]
At his point I open my billfold and hand him the $2 bill. He
looks at it kind of funny and
Server: "Uh, hang on a sec, I'll be right back."
He goes to talk to his manager, who is stil
Did you ever notice that a lot of people will do just about anything to get attention?
Like putting jokes up on a website!
P.S I love Wocka.
One of the funniest things I've heard in a long time.
I was watching T.V. and an advertisement for the show, "Monk" comes on. I don't watch the show, but I love the commercials
He says to a Dr:
"I'm not even stalking you. At least not at the moment."
I laughed for at least ten minutes. Even snorted.
Questions that have Confused humankind!!
Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?"
Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken there....I'm gonna eat the next thing that comes outta its butt."
Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?
If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him?
Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?
If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a
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