Yo momma is so ugly she made a blind person cry!!

Can You Decipher This Phrase? knee light light Neon lights!

Any horizontal surface is soon piled up.

I was reading an article yesterday that was talking about the University of Michigan. They referred to it as MU. This got me to thinking.... What do they call the University of Florida?

Liners

Yo momma so fat that, on the airplane, she smothered the person next to her to death - who was on the aisle seat.

An Englishman, a Scotsman and a rabbi walk into a bar. The rabbi stops and says "I think I'm in the wrong joke."

What's the difference between a Western necktie and a cow's tail? The cow's tail covers the whole asshole.

Q: What is brown, has four legs, and a trunk? A: A mouse coming back from vacation.

Ole goes out one day to use the outhouse, and he finds Sven there. Sven has his wallet out, and he's throwing money down into the hole of the outhouse. Ole asks, "Uff da! Sven, watcha doin' there, fella? You're throwing the five dollar bill and the ten dollar bill down into the hole of the outhouse! Whatcha doin' that for?" Sven answers, "Well, when I pulled up my trousers I dropped a nickel down there—and I'm not going down into that mess for just a nickel!"

Cop to boy: Which of the two fighting in the street is your father? Boy: I don't know. That's what they're fighting about!

Dreams are like underpants. You've got 'em, but you can't prove you do by showing it to everyone.