A T Rex named Farrell asked his mother if he could dress up in a tutu. His mother replied, "No! Boys don't wear tutus and dance on their tippie-toes!" Farrell yelled, "But mom!" and told his father. His father said, "Son, I'm a balerina and I dance in a tutu." Then the mother fainted and fell on the floor. So father and son danced around the unconscious mother in tutus. They had so much fun, and later had cookies and tea as a treat - and they used the mother as a table.

News just in - the drummer tripped over the cymbals, and hit his head. The hospital spokesperson said, "He'll be all right in a couple of days; he's just suffering from percussion."

Yo mama so short that you can see her feet on the driver license. Yo mama so ugly that when she was born the doctor slap her parents. Yo mama so dumb that she sat on the tv and watches her wheelchair.

Can You Decipher This Phrase? DEINPTH VESTINIGATION In depth investigation!

"Judi, did you ever try marriage counseling?" Monika asked. "No," Judi snarled. "That stupid dickhead, shit-for-brains, moronic ex-husband of mind would have just told the counselor I was 'insensitive.'"

A lady goes to a menswear shop to buy clothes for her husband. When she finds the clothes she likes she goes up to the counter and says, "I would like to buy these please." The man at the counter says, "Certainly, but you must sign this form." The lady says "Why?" but the man ignores her. The form reads as follows: Title: _____ Full Name: _______________________ She fills it in like this: Title: Ms Full Name: Jenny Hollows The man at the counter asks, "What does the 'Ms' mean? Does it mean you are divorced?" and the woman responds with, "It is non specific. It is none of your business if I am divorced or not!" The man says "Wow! Men should get one like that!"

Two old pilot friends in the Air Force were talking about the day's activities: Jenkins (first pilot): Did you hear? Captain Smith jumped out of a B-1 bomber, without a parachute, and he wasn't hurt! Randy (Second Pilot): That's impossible! The fall would have killed him! Jenkins (shakes his head): The bomber hadn't taken off yet.

What's a Mexican called when he's covered in dirt? A churro

A blonde mother runs her own daycare business. She has two of her own kids and has about 15 kids in her daycare. One day the blonde takes the children to the park to play, when a brunette walks up and notices the blonde and her daycare kids. She goes to the blonde and asks her, "Are all these kids yours?" The blonde replies, "No, I have two of my own." The brunette proceeds to ask which two are the blonde's. The blonde laughs and says. "My kids go to the YMCA daycare center." The brunette asks in a puzzled voice, "Why are they there when you run your own daycare?" The blonde looks at her and says, "Because I can't afford what I charge."

I saw yo momma walkin' down the street the other day, with a fat pig under her arm. So, I went up to her and asked, ''Hey, where did you get that?'' and the PIG says ''I won her in a contest!''

Yo momma is so fat, she's NOT on A Diet. . .she's on two Diets cause one ain't fittin' her well!

The Englishman and the Scotsman both walk into a bar. The Irishman ducks under it.