Popular Jokes
There was a blond walking down the street, and she saw an empty coke can on the floor. So she picked it up and handed it to lost property.
Yo mama so dirty that she was banned from a sewage facility because of sanitation worries!
A judge was instructing the jury that because a witness changed his statement after giving it to the police, he should not necessarily be regarded as untruthful.
"For example," the judge said, "when I entered my chambers today, I was certain that I had my gold watch in my pocket, then I remembered that I had left it on my nightstand in my bedroom."
When the judge arrived home that evening, his wife asked, "Why so much urgency for your watch? Don't you think sending three men to pick it up for you was a bit extreme?"
"What?" exclaimed the judge. "I didn't send anyone for my watch, let alone three people. What did you do?"
"I gave it to the first one," replied his wife, "after all, he knew
How can you be sad when you are at the Sunshine Happiness Parade of Friendly Friends?
Little Johnny was eating breakfast one morning.
He got to thinking about things, and asked, "Mommy, why does Daddy have so little hair on his head?"
"He thinks a lot, dear," replied his mother, pleased with herself for coming up with a such good answer to her husband's baldness.
"Then why do you have so much hair?" asked Little Johnny.
Hello, I am Mr. L, as most people call me. I am going to tell you a story that happened to me years ago.
Here goes!
People were pouring pollution all around they world; strangely, it made certain animals turn gigantic. That happened to a dog one day, it wasn't pretty. I don't know why, but it was chasing me around the city.
Eventually, I gave up and let it do what it wanted to do to me.
It came close to me, lifted its leg and...
I think I know why I it did what it did. I was wearing a shirt with a fire hydrant on it, and all the other ones were broken.
That's my story.
Pete and Mick were in court and standing before the judge.
"Why can't this case be settled out of court?" the judge asked.
Pete looked up at the judge and said, "That's what we were trying to do, your honour, when the police interfered."
Jenny walks into a pet shop and says to Bobby, the owner, "I want to buy a canary." "We have many types," says Bobby, "is there any particular one you're after?"
"Yes," replies Jenny, "its got to be a very good singer. I'm prepared to pay good money for a great singing bird."
"Lady, I've got the very one," says Bobby, "I've been in this business for a long time and this bird has the best singing voice I've ever heard - we don't call it 'Pavarotti' for nothing. I'll get it for you."
As he begins to climb a ladder to reach a small cage on the top shelf, Jenny says, "I hope you're not wasting your time. Just because you're climbing a ladder like a monkey won't make me feel obliged to buy thi
A child named Bob was running through the neighbor's garden. "Hey!" shouted the neighbor, "I thought I told you not to let me catch you here again!"
"Right!" replied the boy, "and you haven't caught me yet!"
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