Teacher: I hope I didn't see you copying the test from your friend. Student: I hope you didn't either

In this age of political correctness we must reajust our terms. People are no longer concidered gay, here are two better options: Good: A wanabe transvestite Best: Heterosexually challenged.

What is green and yellow and eats nuts? GONORRHEA

Guy goes into a drug store and asks for deodorant. Assistant says, "Aerosol or ball-type?" to which he replies, "Neither, it's for under my arms."

Why do black people wear hats with such big bills? So birds don't shit on their lips

Bought the wife a hamster fur coat for her birthday, she was delighted with it. We went to the fair; took me 4 hours to get her off the big wheel!

A paper bag goes to his doctor, who says; "Your test results are back, and I'm afraid I have bad news. You have AIDS. "That's impossible," cried the paper bag, "I've not had any form of sexual contact, nor am I a drug user!" "In that case," said the doctor, "your father must have been a carrier."

Abortion - Near Life Experience Bald - Follically liberated Blind - Photonically non-receptive Bum - Displaced homeowner Cannibalism - Intra-Species dining Censorship - Selective speech Cheating (Marriage) - Post-Marital Affairs Cheating (School) - Academic Dishonesty Clumsy - Uniquely coordinated Corpse - Permanently static post-human mass Cowboys - Bovine control officers Crime Rate - Street activity index Dead - Living impaired Deaf - Visually oriented Delicatessen - Corpse Farm Dish Washer - Utensil Sanitizer Fat - Person of substance Gas Station Attendant - Petroleum Transfer Technician Hunter - Meat Mercenary Idiot - Factually Unencumbered Insane Person - Selectively Perceptive Midget

How come when you mix water and flour together you get glue?.. and then you add eggs and sugar... and you get cake? Where did the glue go ? NEED AN ANSWER? You know darned well where it went! That's what makes the cake Stick to your BUTT Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to spread the stupidity and send this to someone you want to bring a smile to (maybe even a chuckle). We all need a good laugh - keep on smilin'

newf is cool timmy cool is cool battery is cool girliepie is cool newf is cool drunky is cool all on my buddy list are cool all on wocka are cool all on braingle are cool all on earth are cool all in the many universes are cool I just said you're cool vote full funny to agree you're cool schatzy228 is an @$$hole

Guy goes to see his doctor - "Doctor, please help me, I've got kleptomania bad!" "OK, take these pills, one a day, but if they've not worked in a month, could you get me an LCD telly?"

Knock, knock. Who's there? Esther. Esther who? The Esther Bunny. Knock, knock. Who's there? Stella. Stella who? Stella nother Esther Bunny. Knock, knock. Who's there? Samoa. Samoa who? Samoa Esther Bunnies. Knock, knock. Who's there? Consumption. Consumption who? Consumption be done about all these Esther Bunnies? Knock, knock. Who's there? Esther. Esther who? Esther anyone else as sick of this joke as I am?