Popular Jokes
Knock-Knock,
Who's there?
Alarm.
Alarm who?
Alarm the cops about all the partying I've been having!!
Two men were riding on a train. One of them had a bottle in his coat pocket, and the other one wanted it. Finally the train went through a dark tunnel and the man was able to take the bottle out and drink up all the "whisky" inside of it. Then he put it back into the other man's pocket. When the train came out of the tunnel, the man who owned the bottle took it out of his pocket, opened it up, and spit into it.
You are a redneck if:
You've ever bought steel-toed boots, only to remove the steel to patch a hole in your trailer.
You are a redneck if:
you've ever gotten a headache reading the newspaper.
Knock-Knock.
Who's there?
Accordion.
Accordion who?
Accordion to the t.v., it's going to be cold out.
How is it we look in a dictionary to figure out how to spell something if we don't know how to spell it?
The best things in life are free and the worst things in life cost only $19.95.
A farmer is going down the road with his horse pulling his wagon and his dog lying next to 'em. The farmer says, "It sure is hot out here." The horse turns back and says, "It sure is." The farmer says, "I didn't know horses could talk." The dog said, "Neither did I."
The teacher asked her students to use the word 'fascinate' in a sentence. Mary said, "My family went to the New York City Zoo, and we saw all the animals. It was fascinating."
The teacher said, "That was good, but I wanted the word 'fascinate'."
Sally raised her hand. She said, "My family went to the Philadelphia Zoo and saw the animals. I was fascinated."
The teacher said, "Good, but I wanted the word 'fascinate'."
Little Johnny Siebert raised his hand. The teacher hesitated because Johnny was noted for his bad language. She finally decided there was no way he could damage the word 'fascinate' so she called on him.
Johnny said, "My sister has a sweater with 10 buttons, but her tits are
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