Popular Jokes
So I have this great knock knock joke for you!
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Hello?
Hello who?
Hello?
Hello who!!?
Oh Hi?
Hey, I have this great knock knock joke for you!
Okay knock knock.
Who's there?
Hello?
Who's there!!!!!!??
The door slams.
Knock knock. Ding Dong.
Fine.
Hello?
Hello?
Hello!!!?
*peacecylone*
Person #1: "Want to hear a joke?"
Person #2: "Sure."
Person #1: "Your face."
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Your momma is so fat, she is overweight.
~
Two turds were hanging out. The first one was moaning and groaning. The second one asked, "What's wrong?" The first one replied, "I feel like crap."
DOS Beer
Requires you to use your own can opener, and requires you to read the directions carefully before opening the can. Originally only came in an 8-oz. can, but now comes in a 16-oz. can. However, the can is divided into 8 compartments of 2 oz. each, which have to be accessed separately. Soon to be discontinued, although a lot of people are going to keep drinking it after it's no longer available.
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Mac Beer
At first, came only a 16-oz. can, but now comes in a 32-oz. can. Considered by many to be a "light" beer. All the cans look identical. When you take one from the fridge, it opens itself. The ingredients list is not on the ca
Dear Bob in Tech Support,
I'm currently running the latest version of GirlFriend and I've been having some problems lately. I've been running the same version of DrinkingBuddies 1.0 forever, as my primary application, and all the GirlFriend releases I've
tried have always conflicted with it.
I hear that DrinkingBuddies won't crash if GirlFriend is run in background mode and the sound is turned off, but I'm embarrassed to say I can't find the switch to turn the sound off. I just run them separately, and it works
okay. GirlFriend also seems to have a problem co-existing with my Leisure 3.1 and QuietTime programs, often trying to abort them with some sort of timing incompatibility.
I probabl
When you marry, your spouse's family become "in-laws." So, when you divorce, does that make them "outlaws?"
Chuck Norris has two speeds: Walk and Kill.
Someone once tried to tell Chuck Norris that roundhouse kicks aren't the best way to kick someone. This has been recorded by historians as the worst mistake anyone has ever made.
Contrary to popular belief, America is not a democracy, it is a Chucktatorship.
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is based on a true story: Chuck Norris once swallowed a turtle whole, and when he crapped it out, the turtle was six feet tall and had learned karate.
Chuck Norris is not hung like a horse... horses are hung like Chuck Norris.
Faster than a speeding bullet ... more powerful than a locomotive ... able to leap tall buildings in a single bound... yes, these a
A little boy opened the big and old family Bible with fascination, looking at the old pages as he turned them. Then something fell out, and he picked it up and looked at it closely. It was an old leaf from a tree, that had been pressed between the pages.
"Momma, look what I found," the boy called out.
"What have you got there, dear?" his mother asked.
With astonishment in the his voice, he answered, "It's Adam's Suit!"
One day a little boy and a little girl are outside playing together and they get into an argument.
The little boy holds up an army man and says " I bet you don't have one of these!"
The little girl finds her army man and holds it up "Yes I do!" she says in a superior tone.
The little boy looks through his toys and holds up a dump truck and says "Well I bet you don't have one of these!"
Once again the little girl looks through her toys and finds a dump truck and holds it up and says "Oh yes I do!" in a superior tone.
The little boy is starting to get mad so he looks through his toys and finally finds a cap gun. He holds it up and yells "Well I bet you don't have one of these!"
The littl
On a rural road a state trooper pulled this farmer over and said, "Sir, do you realize your wife fell out of the car several miles back?"
To which the farmer replied, "Thank God, I thought I had gone deaf!"
What's the last thing that goes through a fly's mind when he hits your windshield?
His asshole!
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