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Why does jello have a smell when you add the powder in the water, but when it "gels" the scent virtually disappears? Can a unborn baby fart or burp? If a baseball player hits a home run over the fence, but then dies before he can run around the bases, does the home run count? If a General is a higher ranking officer than a Major, then why is a major illness worse than a general illness? Why don't they make Root Beer flavored ice cream? Wouldn't it be better than root beer floats? Why is there never a full English dinner or tea but there is always a full English breakfast? What is the point in saying "may I ask" and then follow it up with a question? Is it possible to be allergic to water? Wh

My friend told me these songs about Barney. I hope you like them. (In rhythm to I Love You) I hate you You hate me We're a violent family With a great big gun and a bang from me to you Won't you say you hate me too. (In rhythm to Joy To The World) Joy to the world Barney's dead I barbequed his head What happened to his body I flushed it down the potty And around and around it goes And around and around it And around and around around around it goes

Yo mamas so dumb she put a quarter in a parking meter and said "Hey! Wheres my gumball?".

Commandment 1. Marriages are made in heaven. But so again, are thunder and lightning. Commandment 2. If you want your spouse to listen and pay strict attention to every word you say, talk in your sleep. Commandment 3. Marriage is grand -- and divorce is at least 100 grand! Commandment 4. Married life is very frustrating. In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens. In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens. In the third year, they both speak and the neighbors listen. Commandment 5. When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of one thing: Either the car is new or the wife is. Commandment 6. Marriage is when a

Q.What did one sheep call the other sheep who stole his food? A. a ba-a-astard

You might be a redneck if your baby stroller consists of a potato sack and a wheelbarrow.

Yo mama's so scary, she killed Freddy Krouger in his own dreams.