What does a blonde and a screendoor have in common? The harder you bang them the looser they get. Why did the blonde climb the glass wall? To see what was on the other side. What is the first thing a blonde does in the morning? Get dressed and go home

Nicholaas (toe 4) het by sy ouma gaan kuier, en ouma het dit goed gedink om hom bietjie groentes te leer eet wat sy ma nie graag gaar maak nie. Die spesifieke dag is broccoli aan die beurt, en ouma versin die oulikste stories oor die boompies wat hy gaan proe. Hy begin ewe entosiasties aan die eerste een eet, maar ouma sien hy kou al stadiger en kry so veraf trek in sy ogies. "Ouma," roep hy toe sy ouma wat intussen in die spens verdwyn het, "kom kyk hier!" Die mannetjie beduie toe na sy bord waar hy die laaste "boompie" staan gemaak het, mooi vasgedruk in die middel van die rys. "Kyk net, hierdie is die Paradys, en daardie boom is die boom waarvan God gesê het ons mag nie eet nie!"

Why did the blond have blisters on her lips? From trying to blow out lightbulbs!

How do you keep a blond busy? Write "please turn over" on both sides of a paper!

One blond to another: "The electicity break down was terrible. I was stuck in the lift for 2 hours." The other blond: "That's nothing, I stood on the elevator for 6 hours!!!

Wat is die toppunt van geraas? 2 geraamtes wat woellig spyker op n sinkdak met n coke blikkie as n kondoom!

Pappa : jy moet nou soet wees, ek gan jou tottie afkap. Seuntjie : kan ma afkap, want sussie sin is klaar af en omgedop en dit lyk BEFOK!!

Prostitute shouting accross the street - "Hey, black boy! You want a blow job?" He shouts back "Fuck off! I don't want ANY job!"

If a kid asks where rain comes from, I tell him, "God is crying." And if he asks why God is crying, I tell him, "Probably because of something you did."

Yo momma so old, she still owes Moses a dollar.

You are a redneck if: You've ever carved a gunstock out of a bedpost.

The following were some comments made in the year 1957: (1) "I'll tell you one thing, if things keep going the way they are, it's going to be impossible to buy a week's groceries for $20.00." (2) "Have you seen the new cars coming out next year? It won't be long when $5,000 will only buy a used one." (3) "If cigarettes keep going up in price, I'm going to quit. A quarter a pack is ridiculous." (4) "Did you hear the post office is thinking about charging a dime just to mail a letter?" (5) "If they raise the minimum wage to $1, nobody will be able to hire outside help at the store." (6) "When I first started driving, who would have thought gas would someday cost 29 cents a gallon.