Category Jokes - Blonde
A blonde goes for a job interview in an office. The interviewer decides to start with the basics.
"So, Miss, can you tell me your age, please?" The blonde counts carefully on her fingers for about 30 seconds before replying, "Ehhhh ... 22!"
The interviewer tries another straightforward one to break the ice. "And can you tell me your height, please?"
The young lady stands up and produces a measuring tape from her handbag. She then traps one end under her foot and extends the tape to the top of her head. She checks the measurement and announces, "Five foot two."
This isn't looking good, so the interviewer goes for the real basics. "And ehh, just to confirm for our records, your name, p
Two sisters, one blonde and one brunette, inherit the family ranch. Unfortunately, after just a few years, they are in financial trouble. In order to keep the bank from repossessing the ranch, they need to purchase a bull so that they can breed their own stock.
The brunette balances their checkbook, then takes their last 600 dollars out west to another ranch where a man has a prize bull for sale.
Upon leaving, she tells her sister, "When I get there, if I decide to buy the bull, I'll contact you to drive out after me and haul it home."
The brunette arrives at the man's ranch, inspects the bull, and decides she does want to buy it. The man tells her that he can sell it for $599, no less.
What's the difference between a smart blonde and Bigfoot?
Maybe someday we'll find Bigfoot.
What do you call a blonde which is as sweet as a pickle and has dirty blonde hair?
A sweet potatoe!
There were three blondes in the forest and they saw some tracks.
The first blonde said, "Look, bear tracks."
The second blonde said, "No, stupid, those are wolf tracks."
The third blonde said, "You're both wrong, those are rabbit tracks."
Then the train came and ran them all over.
A blonde is terribly overweight, so her doctor puts her on a diet. "I want you to eat regularly for 2 days, then skip a day, and repeat this procedure for 2 weeks. The next time I see you, you'll have lost at least 5 pounds."
When the blonde returned, she shocked the doctor by losing nearly 20 pounds. "Why, that's amazing!" the doctor said, "Did you follow my instructions?"
The blonde nodded, "I'll tell you though, I thought I was going to drop dead that 3rd day."
"From hunger, you mean?" asked the doctor.
"No, from all that skipping."
Blonde jokes started when a brunette and a red head had to much time on their hands, because a blond was out with their boyfriends.
Three blondes died and are at the pearly gates of heaven. St. Peter tells them that they can enter the gates if they can answer one simple question.
St. Peter asks the first blonde, "What is Easter?" The blonde replies, "Oh, that's easy! It's the holiday in November when everyone gets together, eats turkey, and are thankful..."
"Wrong!" replies St. Peter, and proceeds to ask the second blonde the same question, "What is Easter?" The second blonde replies, "Easter is the holiday in December when we put up a nice tree, exchange presents, and celebrate the birth of Jesus."
St. Peter looks at the second blonde, shakes his head in disgust, tells her she's wrong, and then peers over his glasses
Q: Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito?
A: A mosquito will stop sucking when you smack it!
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