Marble is a valuable building material and should not be taken for granite.

Disinformation is not as good as datinformation.

ASCII stupid question, get a stupid ANSI!

I learned French in six easy liasons.

Seems Paris Hilton is having visits from a speech therapist - she's having trouble finishing a sentence!

If Henry IV were cloned, would he be Henry V, or Henry IV Jr. or, would he be Henry IV Part II? (Willy Wagstaff, more usually known as William Shakespeare)

Why do melons get married in church? - Because they cantaloupe.

It was a sweltering August day when the Greenberg brothers entered the posh Dearborn, Michigan offices of the notoriously anti-Semitic car-maker, Henry Ford. "Mr. Ford," announced Hyman Greenberg, the eldest of the three, "we have a remarkable invention that will revolutionize the automobile industry." Ford looked skeptical, but their threats to offer it to the competition kept his interest piqued. "We would like to demonstrate it to you in person." After a little cajoling, they brought Mr. Ford outside and asked him to enter a black car that was parked in front of the building. Norman Greenberg, the middle brother, opened the door of the car. "Please step inside Mr. Ford." "What?" shout

America is a land of untold wealth. - Internal Revenue Service.

"Do you like the new car Alice and I just bought?" Tom asked onerously.

Did you hear about the eyeglasses maker who moved his shop to an island off Alaska and is now known as an optical Aleutian?

Fool me once shame on you Fool me twice shame on me Fool me thrice you are not nice Fool me four times and I am gonna cap your sorry ass.