A car breaks down along the highway one day, so the driver eases it over onto the shoulder. He jumps out of the car, opens the trunk, and pulls out two men in long black trench coats. The men stand behind the car, open up their coats and start exposing themselves to all the oncoming traffic. This results in one of the worst pile-ups. When the police questioned him why he put two deviates along the side of the road, the man replied, "I broke down and was just using my emergency flashers!"

What did Margie say about her brain surgeon? "I really gave him a piece of my mind!"

Why should you look out for a pig that knows karate? It might give you a pork chop!

Movie stars are a reel treat!

How did Alfo make a quart of juice from 3 oranges? It was a tight squeeze.

What do you get when the post office burns down? A case of black mail.

What do Gorillas Sleep on in fruit orchards? Apricots.

Why does Tommy run around the school track 98 times every day? He has a run track mind.

How does a rodeo star get around? With a cattle-act.

What happened when Ray Johnson fell off the Empire State Building? Now everyone calls him x-ray.

Why did the Quiz Show give away $10,000 plus one banana? They wanted the prize to have appeal.

Time may fly, but does it have wings?