One employee asked another, "How long have you been working here?" The second said, "Ever since the boss threatened to fire me!"

What do you get when you cross a dinosaur with a pig? Jurassic pork!

Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy!

"This storm is bad," Bob thundered.

A teacher is telling her class she has two words that will not be allowed to use. Teacher: There are two words which I will never let you use. One is gross and the other is cool. Student: So what are the words?

Why was Johnny's math book sad? It had too many problems!

jkfsh

Bob: How do you keep a turkey in suspense? Willie: I dunno. Bob: I'll tell you later...

There is no job so simple that it cannot be done wrnog.

I knocked several times, but you weren't in. - Opportunity

If an item is advertised as "under $50", you can bet it's not $19.95.

If flattery gets you nowhere, try bribery.