Alabama • A 1950 anti-obscenity law in Irondale, Ala., prohibited any showing of anyone nude or "in a substantially nude state" except a babe in arms. • Anniston: You may not wear blue jeans down Noble Street. • An ordinance in Linden, Ala., provided that all women of "uncertain chastity" had to be off the streets by 9 p.m. • Bear wrestling matches are prohibited. • Boogers may not be flicked into the wind. • Children of incestuous couples are deemed legitimate. • Dominoes may not be played on Sunday. • Hunting is not allowed on Sunday. • Incestuous marriages are legal. • It is illegal for a driver to be blindfolded while operating a vehicle. • It is illegal to imp

Alaska • A law in Fairbanks does not allow moose to have sex on city streets. (O_o) • Even though it is legal to hunt a bear, it is illegal to wake a bear for photo opportunities. (is shooting waking?) • Fairbanks: It is considered an offense to feed alcoholic beverages to a moose. (but why?) • In Alaska it is illegal to whisper in someone's ear while they are moose hunting. • It is considered an offense to push a live moose out of a moving airplane. (How did the moose get in the flippin plane?) • Kangaroos are not allowed in barber shops at any time. • Moose may not be viewed from an airplane. • State policy states that emergencies are held to a minimum and rarely found t

California • A city ordinance states that a $500 fine will be given to anyone who detonates a nuclear device within city limits. • Alhambra: You cannot leave your car on the street overnight without the proper permit. • Animals are banned from mating publicly within 1,500 feet of a tavern, school, or place of worship. • A regulation in San Francisco makes it unlawful to use used underwear to wipe off cars in a car wash. • Arcadia: Peacocks have the right of way to cross any street, including driveways. • A server in California can be convicted of selling to a minor if the purchaser uses a false or altered ID to buy the alcohol. • Baldwin Park: Nobody is allowed to ride a b

Colorado • Car dealers may not show cars on a Sunday. • Colorado law requires that wine be sold in containers of at least 24 ounces and spirits in containers at least a fifth of a gallon. But, at the same time, it also decrees that no alcohol beverage can be stored in hotel minibars in anything larger than miniature containers. • Colorado Springs: It is permissible to wear a holstered six-gun within city limits, except on Sunday, Election Day, or holidays. • Crippe Creek: It is illegal to bring your horse or pack mule above the ground floor of any building. • Denver: The dog catcher must notify dogs of impounding by posting, for three consecutive days, a notice on a tree in the

Due to high demmand, I will not maker you wait for all 50 states to come out, instead, here is ALL OF THE 51 states of laws. Alabama • A 1950 anti-obscenity law in Irondale, Ala., prohibited any showing of anyone nude or "in a substantially nude state" except a babe in arms. • Anniston: You may not wear blue jeans down Noble Street. • An ordinance in Linden, Ala., provided that all women of "uncertain chastity" had to be off the streets by 9 p.m. • Bear wrestling matches are prohibited. • Boogers may not be flicked into the wind. • Children of incestuous couples are deemed legitimate. • Dominoes may not be played on Sunday. • Hunting is not allowed on Sunday. • Ince

The GOP Congress will re-introduce drilling for oil in the Arctic. Republicans say the environmental effect is minimal; a study shows caribou do not make campaign contributions.

Hello, and welcome to the Psychiatric Hotline.If you are obsessive-compulsive, please press 1 repeatedly. If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2. If you have multiple personalities, please press 3, 4, 5 and 6. If you are paranoid-delusional...

Are you a Democrat, Republican or Southerner? Here is a little test that will help you decide. The answer can be found by posing the following question: You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children. Suddenly, an Islamic Terrorist with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, praises Allah, raises the knife, and charges at you. You are carrying a Glock cal 40, and you are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family. What do you do? ........................................................ Democrat's Answer: Well, that's not enough information to answer th

This last weekend I was reminded at the pace we are converting to metric. I was on I-75 in Ohio when I saw a sign that said: All signs metric - Next 20 miles.

Leonid Brezhnev, a former ruler of Russia, was thought not to be too bright. He comes to address a big Communist party meeting, and starts: "Dear Comrade Imperialists," The whole hall perked up - "what did he say?" Brezhnev tried again... "Dear Comrade Imperialists," Well, by now the hall was in pandemonium - was he trying to call them Imperialists? Then, an advisor walked over to the podium and pointed to the speech for Brezhnev. "Oh..." he muttered, and started again: "Dear Comrades, Imperialists are everywhere."

A man is sitting on a bench in the park reading a newspaper. Suddenly he throws the paper onto the ground and yells, "All politicians are assholes." A man sitting next to him in a finely pressed suit says, "I take offense to that!" The pissed-off guy asks him, "Why? Are you a politician?" "No," he replies, "I'm an asshole."

Four teenagers were arrested in the parking lot of a large mall in Lakeland, Fla. just before Christmas. In an attempt to steal an automobile at random, they tried to break into a police van containing three officers on a stakeout.