Category Jokes - Other / Misc
A girl was calling her boyfriend because he wasn't online and she wanted him to be.
"Hello?" he said, groggily.
"I want you to get up and get your ass online." she said.
"How?"
"I don't know. Get a scanner if you need to. Just get your ass online!"
There was a teenaged girl name Amanda, who just stepped out of the shower. She wrapped a towel around her body, and went into her room. She was very excited because her long time crush, Jason, was coming over to have dinner. She turned the radio on and her favorite song was playing, so she started to dance and sing. When the song was over she stopped dancing and realized that her towel had come off. She looked towards the door and saw that it was open, and Jason was standing there.
You are working on your family genealogy and for sake of example, let's say that your great-great uncle, Remus Starr, a fellow lacking in character, was hanged for horse stealing and train robbery in Montana in 1889.
A cousin has supplied you with the only known photograph of Remus, showing him standing on the gallows. On the back of the picture are the words:
"Remus Starr: Horse thief, sent to Montana Territorial Prison, 1885. Escaped 1887, robbed the Montana Flyer six times. Caught by Pinkerton detectives, convicted and hanged, 1889."
Pretty grim situation, right? But let's revise things a bit. We simply crop the picture, scan in an enlarged image and edit it with image processing softw
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