why did hitler kill himself? because he saw his gas bill

they says theres safety in numbers? tell that to six million jews!

A black man and a Jew jump off a building; who wins? Society.

why are black people getting stronger? tv's are getting bigger

Whats the difference between a black man and a farm tractor? Nothing! The tractor is just an upgrade!

Why did the Japanese steal the Diaoyu Islands? Because they don't have enough room for their funny farms!

My girl told me she was trying to lose weight, so I said, "Do whatever makes you happy inside. Just keep in mind that your weight's just a number. There's no number in the world to measure how beautiful you are . . . unless you include negative numbers."

What is the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Claus? Santa only has three Ho's.

Hitler walks into a bar; he's depressed. He goes up to the counter and orders three shots. The bartender gives them to him and Hitler downs them. Hitler orders three more shots; the bartender gives them to him and Hitler downs them. Hitler orders three more shots. The bartender asks Hitler why he's so depressed. Hitler replies, "Give me the shots and I'll tell you," so the bartender gives him the shots and he downs them. Then the bartender asks why he's so depressed. Hitler replies, "I just killed six millions Jews and a clown." The bartender replies, "Why a clown?" Hitler says, "See? Nobody cares about the Jews!"

Why was the diver angry at the diving board? Because it flipped him off.

Why wasn't Jesus born in Japan? He couldn't find three wise men or a virgin there.

Customer: "Are you Hispanic?" Me: "No." Customer: "Middle Eastern?" Me: "No." Customer: "Egyptian?" Me: "No." Customer: "What are you?" Me: "Chinese." (customer puts on offended face) Customer: "I don't appreciate you treating me like I'm dumb." Me: "Excuse me? I'm being honest." Customer: "NO CHINESE PERSON WOULD EVER HAVE EYES AS BIG AS YOURS!!!" Me: *mouth wide open*