When you were born, God admitted that even he sometimes made mistakes!

Winston Churchill (whose mother was American) was Prime Minister of Britain during World War II. These are some insults he was involved in - Lady Astor – "Winston, if you were my husband, I would put poison in your coffee." Winston Churchill – "Madam, if you were my wife, I would drink it!" Bessie Braddock – "Winston, you're drunk!" Winston – "Bessie, you are ugly, but tomorrow morning, I shall be sober!" Bernard Shaw sent Churchill two tickets to a first night, with a note saying – "Bring a friend – if you have one." Churchill replied, saying that he could not attend the first night as he was busy, and asked for tickets for the second night – "If you have one."

Good insult: Your mom goes to college! Good comeback: How do you know? Stalker!

You call me ugly? Where is your mirror, boy?

If your brain was dynamite, you wouldn't have enough to blow your hat off!

This joke may seem racist to some. I just wanted to warn you of this before you read it. Sally - Where does a baby go after he or she has passed away? Joe - I don't know. Sally - To heaven. What does the baby get after he or she arrives in heaven? Joe - I don't know. Sally - Wings. What is the baby called? Joe - I don't know. Sally - An Angel. Where does a black baby go after he or she has passed away? Joe - I don't know. Sally - To heaven. What does the baby get after he or she arrives in heaven? Joe - I don't know. Sally - Wings. What is the baby called? Joe - A bat!

What do you call a group of white people running down a hill? Avalanche! What do you call a group of black people running down a hill? Mudslide! What do you call a group of Latinos running down a hiil? JAILBREAK! How do you find the country of Mexico? Roll a quarter down a hill. How do you find the richest Mexican? Find the one who got the quarter!

I'll be sober tomorrow, but you'll be ugly for the rest of your life.

newf is cool timmy cool is cool battery is cool girliepie is cool newf is cool drunky is cool all on my buddy list are cool all on wocka are cool all on braingle are cool all on earth are cool all in the many universes are cool I just said you're cool vote full funny to agree you're cool schatzy228 is an @$$hole

Any similarity between you and a human is purely coincidental! Anyone who told you to be yourself couldn't have given you worse advice. Are your parents siblings? As an outsider, what do you think of the human race? Better at sex than anyone; now all he needs is a partner. Calling you stupid would be an insult to stupid people. Did your parents ever ask you to run away from home? Do you ever wonder what life would be like if you'd had enough oxygen at birth? Do you want people to accept you as you are or do you want them to like you? Don't you have a terribly empty feeling - in your skull? Do you still love nature, despite what it did to you? Don't you need a license to

Did your parents have any kids that lived?

Q: Which sexual position produces the ugliest children? A: Ask your Mom.