You're so stupid that you sold your car for gas money!

You're so stupid, you tried to kill a bird by throwing it off a cliff.

Your so stupid you invented glow in the dark sun glasses!

You're so dumb you invented water proof tea bags!

You're so fat, when you went outside wearing a yellow dress everybody called "TAXI"

You're so ugly, you can't even turn on a lightbulb!

You're so fat that everybody has to talk behind your back!

You're so stupid that when you send a FAX you put a stamp on it

You're so poor I went in your front door and came out the back.

Why don't you slip into something comfortable. Like a coma.

I haven't seen anyone run that fast since Twinkies went on sale.

Some useful descriptions of people you may come into contact with from day to day. 1. Not the sharpest knife in the drawer. 2. Got into the gene pool while the lifeguard wasn't watching. 3. A room temperature IQ. 4. Got a full 6-pack, but lacks the plastic thingy to hold them together. 5. A photographic memory, but the lens cover is glued on. 6. A prime candidate for natural de-selection. 7. Bright as Alaska in December. 8. During evolution, his ancestors were in the control group. 9. Fell out of the family tree. 10. Gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the train isn't coming. 11. Has two brains; one is lost and the other is out looking for it. 12. He's so dense, light bends around h