Some Of My Favorite One-Liners

Never test the depth of water with both feet. Don't take candy from strangers, unless they offer you a ride. I'll start exercising as soon as i get into shape. If you have something to say, raise your hand and put it over your mouth. Maybe you should go to e-bay and buy a clue. Earth is full. go home. Gee, I'd like to care, but I wasn't given that gene. Mirrors don't lie, and lucky for you, they can't laugh either. (i like this one) If you can't laugh at yourself, at least let me do it. I don't know what makes you so dumb, but it really works. Men are from Mars, Women are from Visa. (ok that was kind'a dumb) I used to have super powers but my therapist took them away.