Jesus Christ!

[Jesus signed on at 11:29 pm.] Jesus: Hello and welcome to the kingdom of heaven! Bob: Oh wow you mean I can come in? Jesus: All are welcome. Tell me what is the way you died? Bob: Well I was in a coma. Half my family wanted me on life support half didn't. Jesus: I see... Bob: Oh crap brb [Bob went away at 11:31 pm.] Jesus: ? :( [Bob came back at 11:45 pm.] Bob: Sorry other half of the family Jesus: I see... now this is- Bob: brb [Bob went away at 11:47 pm.] Jesus: ... [Bob came back at 11:59 pm.] Bob: They just can't make up their minds! Jesus: Clearly... Bob: So Heaven eh? Jesus: Yea it's the most [Bob went away at 12:02 am] Jesus: Screw this. [Jesus signed out at 12:03 am.] [Bob came back at 12:17 am] Bob: Jesus they decided to let me die! Bob: Both sides agreed... Bob: Jesus? Bob: You there? [Satan signed in at 12:19 am]