Collection of "You Know You're a Redneck When..." Number 2

Managed to remember some MORE Redneck lines while hearing a couple more. You know you're a redneck when: You lost your virginity at the age of 11. You need an estimate from your barber before you get a haircut. Taking a dip has nothing to do with water. There are more than ten lawsuits currently pending against your dog. You take a fishing pole to Sea World. The hood and one door are a different color from the rest of your car. Your TV is a bag of manure on fire. Your "family reunion" was at the NRA convention. Santa Claus refuses to let your kids sit in his lap. You've shot somebody over a mall parking space. Your toilet paper has page numbers on it. Making a chocolate cake has nothing to do with chocolate. You think the O.J. trial was the big Sunkist and Minutemaid taste test.