Checkout Lines

Here are the reasons I'd Like to thank Wal-Mart, K-Mart, Target, and my local grocer for having 25 checkout lanes and only three open at any given time. - Waiting in long lines keeps my domestic brain from going completely idle -- there's so much to learn! - I can catch up on my magazine reading without buying any. - I have time to leave my cart in line and run back to get the 13 things on my list I forgot. - I can be one of those annoying cell phone users and catch up on all my phone calls to my insurance agent, mother-in-law, and Auntie Anne. - I can catch a quick catnap now rather than on the drive home. - I can assess what other people have in their carts and get exciting new dinner ideas. - I can finally apply my top coat of nail polish with plenty of drying time. - I can run next door and pick up my dry cleaning. - I can update my coupon organizer and leave the trash in the we-never-open-enough-checkout-lanes store instead of my purse. - I can practice my standup comedy routines on unsuspecting fellow customers. - I can practice some standing yoga poses and then do those isometric muscle-contracting exercises no one else in line is supposed to know you're doing. - I can taste my package of the newest low-carb, zero-transfat, Splenda-saturated cookies. - I can breathe heavily on my T-bones so they're defrosted in time for dinner and I won't have to leave them out on the driveway in the hot late afternoon sun as I normally do.